Trust

Hi again,
Trust. This is something I struggle with immensely. I don't trust really at all and I am almost always second guessing people and their actions or words. I am trying to be open in the attempt to prove to myself that I can trust but I think being open and trusting are actually 2 different things entirely. I suppose being open I have to trust that people won't hate me when they learn more about who I am but it isn't exactly trust. The latest example of not trusting people I think would be that I am attempting to send an email to someone and apparently it is not coming through but any other emails I send asking if it came through the person says that those came through. Hmm...I think anyone would start to wonder with this one but me especially right off the bat I assumed this person was not being honest. But I don't say that because I suppose even I am not completely honest in terms of I don't want to accuse anyone unless I have some more to go on. So I just keep trying to send the message and I continue to not trust this person in terms of how honest this person is being. I do not have any clue how to fix this but I am trying. I suppose it is also a bit of paranoia also. Though I think I am getting better at trusting people enough to be more open. It is still a struggle but I am getting better at it. I actually think blogging is making it easier for me. lol At first when I first started blogging-I was terrified of being open about myself but that is why I did this to help myself as well as share about myself and the struggles and joys I go through that it may help others. It is important to face fear. Sometimes it is difficult but I think the harder it is-the more important to overcome it. Thanks for reading!