Hi again,
Sorry for the absense again. Today I want to share a poem that I love. I hope you like it as much as I do. It was read at my cousin's funeral who died at a very young age. This always reminds me how short life is and to live the best I can with the time I have here. thanks and enjoy.
The '-' Dash
Words by Linda Ellis
I read of a Reverend who stood to speak,
At the funeral of his friend,
He referred to the dates on (his) tombstone
From the beginning ... to the end.
He noted that first came the date of (his) birth
And spoke of the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all
Was the dash between those years.
For that dash represents all the time
That (he) spent alive on earth
and now only those who loved (him)
know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own;
The cars, the house, the cash.
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend out the dash.
So think about this long and hard;
Are there things you'd like to change?
For you never know how much time is left
(You could be at "dash mid-range").
If we could just slow down enough
To consider what's true and real,
And always try to understand
The way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger,
And show appreciation more,
And love the people in our lives
Like we've never loved before.
If we treat each other with respect
And more often wear a smile,
Remembering that this special dash
Might only last a little while.
So when your Eulogy is being read
With your life's actions to rehash ...
Would you be pleased with the things they say
About how you spent your dash?
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Talking Green: When do I transplant?
Hi again,
Transplanting. I consider this different from pricking out because this is something you do either when the plant has gotten too big for the cell or it is time to put the plant into pots or the ground. You don't need to transplant really until the plants have outgrown their current home but you can transplant sooner than that. I like to wait until the plants have grown at least a few inches tall or they need more room for their roots because each time I transplant, it seems to shock the plant a little and they have to get used to their new home so I try to avoid it if I don't need to. I need to mention here that it is incredibly important to give a plant sufficient room for their roots to grow. Otherwise a plant will become stunted when it runs out of room for it's roots. When this happens it is generally called root bound and you can tell by looking at the roots and they are running in circles around the edge of the pot. With young plants though, it can be difficult and sometimes next to impossible to pull them out of the cell to check the root system. So the best way to know is to watch for roots poking through the bottom of the cells or if it seems that the plant has sort of stopped growing. These are both indications the plant is starting to run out of room. A plant can have roots poking through the bottom of the cell and not be root bound because they send roots straight down first but if roots have reached the bottom, chances are the roots will start to circle around the pot soon. It is best to transplant before a plant gets root bound. Giving a plant sufficient room for roots can really affect the size of the plant. I did a little experiment last year to see how much it would affect the plants and I left some marigolds a little longer in the cells and transplanted others and within a couple of weeks, the plants that were transplanted were nearly double the size. This is in no way a scientific experiment and just something for fun but it shows that giving a plant enough room is very important.
Also depending on where you are planning to transplant to can make a difference when to transplant. If you are planning to transplant in to your flower bed then the bigger the plant, the better I think. The more mature an annual is, the tougher it is. Also it is important to wait until it is warm enough that it isn't freezing over night any longer and the plants have been hardened off. I will talk about hardening off in the next post. Have fun!
Transplanting. I consider this different from pricking out because this is something you do either when the plant has gotten too big for the cell or it is time to put the plant into pots or the ground. You don't need to transplant really until the plants have outgrown their current home but you can transplant sooner than that. I like to wait until the plants have grown at least a few inches tall or they need more room for their roots because each time I transplant, it seems to shock the plant a little and they have to get used to their new home so I try to avoid it if I don't need to. I need to mention here that it is incredibly important to give a plant sufficient room for their roots to grow. Otherwise a plant will become stunted when it runs out of room for it's roots. When this happens it is generally called root bound and you can tell by looking at the roots and they are running in circles around the edge of the pot. With young plants though, it can be difficult and sometimes next to impossible to pull them out of the cell to check the root system. So the best way to know is to watch for roots poking through the bottom of the cells or if it seems that the plant has sort of stopped growing. These are both indications the plant is starting to run out of room. A plant can have roots poking through the bottom of the cell and not be root bound because they send roots straight down first but if roots have reached the bottom, chances are the roots will start to circle around the pot soon. It is best to transplant before a plant gets root bound. Giving a plant sufficient room for roots can really affect the size of the plant. I did a little experiment last year to see how much it would affect the plants and I left some marigolds a little longer in the cells and transplanted others and within a couple of weeks, the plants that were transplanted were nearly double the size. This is in no way a scientific experiment and just something for fun but it shows that giving a plant enough room is very important.
Also depending on where you are planning to transplant to can make a difference when to transplant. If you are planning to transplant in to your flower bed then the bigger the plant, the better I think. The more mature an annual is, the tougher it is. Also it is important to wait until it is warm enough that it isn't freezing over night any longer and the plants have been hardened off. I will talk about hardening off in the next post. Have fun!
Talking Green: Pricking Out
Now I would like to talk about Pricking Out. Once your seeds have germinated and they have grown enough that you can handle them (usually over 1cm tall) you need to seperate them so that they don't compete for light as they grow larger. Seed packages suggest just pulling out the extras and leaving the strongest seedling but for me I can't do it. I feel bad killing plants. So for those of us who don't want to just keep the strongest plant but rather all the plants-pricking out is for us. lol I have actually read books that tell you to grow seeds this way that you sprinkle quite a few into a try and then use the pricking out method to put them in individual cells. Anyways enough about that-here is how you do it. lol For me, I just take something I have on hand which is usually a popsicle stick or the end of a plastic spoon or knife-something with a small end on it. Then I take it and insert it in beside the plant I want to remove and gently push it up. In terms of how deep to go down, I usually insert the popsicle stick about half way down the cell or about an inch or so. Depending on how many seeds are growing, sometimes more than one comes up which is fine. When more than one seedling comes up, just gently pull them apart while being careful with the little roots. It is ok if some of the roots break so don't worry about that. Just be careful to not detach all the roots from the stem! I have read in books that you should hold a seedling by the leaves so you don't bruise the stem but personally I have little luck with that because often the leaves break off the stem quite easily. Just be gentle and everything should be ok. This is another reason it is good to have extras because despite our best intentions, sometimes a seedling breaks and dies. Once you have pricked out the seedlings you want to move to different cells then it is time to plant them.
Planting the seedlings is interesting sometimes with the tiny seedlings like lobelia. For the tiny seedlings I tend to fill each cell full of dirt and make a small hole to insert the seedling so I don't lose it and I don't have to try hold it up while putting dirt around it. For the bigger seedlings, it is not so hard to hold them up so you can usually fill the cell partially full and then put it in and fill up the cell the rest of of the way. Have fun!
Planting the seedlings is interesting sometimes with the tiny seedlings like lobelia. For the tiny seedlings I tend to fill each cell full of dirt and make a small hole to insert the seedling so I don't lose it and I don't have to try hold it up while putting dirt around it. For the bigger seedlings, it is not so hard to hold them up so you can usually fill the cell partially full and then put it in and fill up the cell the rest of of the way. Have fun!
Talking green: Where's the seed?
Today I want to talk about seed sizes for a moment. Seeds come in a wide range of sizes and the smallest I have seen are Lobelia seeds which are incredibly tiny. I would say the size of a grain of sand possibly. The reason I titled this what I did is because I showed the Lobelia seeds to my dad when I was planting them and that was his response. One of the questions I got from my sister was how to plant seeds like this because it is almost next to impossible to control where the seed falls first of all and second to know how much has dropped on to the soil is tough to know. You can count them if you are really willing to spend that much time and effort but if you are like me then you will not have the patience for it. lol So my rule of thumb for the really tiny seeds is to sprinkle a few onto the soil and place a very fine layer of soil over top and then once they are big enough I do what is called pricking out (which I will talk about in another post). With seeds this tiny it is very important to use a spray bottle to water them until they are bigger as to not wash away the seed. Also in my experience the smaller the seed, the longer they seem to take to grow. I could be wrong about this but it seems to be the case. Lobelia take a very long time to grow and I usually start them quite a bit before the other seeds to give them time to grow.
Next I want to touch on the seeds in between the tiny seeds and the big seeds. I like to plant more seeds than what I plan on needing just in case every seed doesn't sprout. Also if they all come up then I have some extras and you can never have too many! If you have limited room, the extra plants make great gifts. Anyways for the seeds that I can see fairly easily like Marigold or cosmos seeds, I will plant two to a cell. This is my own personal choice of course and if you prefer to just plant one-that is perfectly fine. I am not an expert and I am just sharing how I do things and how it works for me. One thing to keep in mind when planting is the age of the seed also. The older the seed is, the less likely it will be to sprout. Depending on how well seed is cared for, it can last many years or as little as a year. I have read that it is a good idea to keep seed in a cool dry place like a fridge and I would love to do this but there just isn't room in the fridge! So I try to keep them in a cupboard that stays cool. Some seeds seem to last longer than others also. So just keep that in mind. When the seeds sprout, if I need to, I prick out the extras and put in other cells.
Now to the other side of the scale in terms of size of seed. The really big seeds are seeds like some sunflower seeds, Nasturtium, Sweet Peas, 4 o'clocks etc. With big seeds I tend to plant one seed per cell because they take up a fair bit of room and for extra seeds I just plant more cells. I find the big seeds sprout pretty fast and you should see them popping up fairly quickly. Also the bigger the seed, the deeper you should plant it. I usually follow the instructions on the package and if I don't have a package then I just plant the seed about the depth of the seed size. I hope this information is useful!
Next I want to touch on the seeds in between the tiny seeds and the big seeds. I like to plant more seeds than what I plan on needing just in case every seed doesn't sprout. Also if they all come up then I have some extras and you can never have too many! If you have limited room, the extra plants make great gifts. Anyways for the seeds that I can see fairly easily like Marigold or cosmos seeds, I will plant two to a cell. This is my own personal choice of course and if you prefer to just plant one-that is perfectly fine. I am not an expert and I am just sharing how I do things and how it works for me. One thing to keep in mind when planting is the age of the seed also. The older the seed is, the less likely it will be to sprout. Depending on how well seed is cared for, it can last many years or as little as a year. I have read that it is a good idea to keep seed in a cool dry place like a fridge and I would love to do this but there just isn't room in the fridge! So I try to keep them in a cupboard that stays cool. Some seeds seem to last longer than others also. So just keep that in mind. When the seeds sprout, if I need to, I prick out the extras and put in other cells.
Now to the other side of the scale in terms of size of seed. The really big seeds are seeds like some sunflower seeds, Nasturtium, Sweet Peas, 4 o'clocks etc. With big seeds I tend to plant one seed per cell because they take up a fair bit of room and for extra seeds I just plant more cells. I find the big seeds sprout pretty fast and you should see them popping up fairly quickly. Also the bigger the seed, the deeper you should plant it. I usually follow the instructions on the package and if I don't have a package then I just plant the seed about the depth of the seed size. I hope this information is useful!
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Talking Green:Let's start at the very beginning
Hi again,
I realize it is too late to start seeds indoors for this season but for some seeds it isn't too late to plant directly outdoors so I will start at the very beginning. I also realize some of this information may be something you already know but for some it may be new information.
Of course to grow seeds you need seeds, soil, tray(s), water and if you are starting them early- a window to put them beside or a greenhouse.
Seeds come in all sizes and as a rule of thumb for me is if there are no definite directions on the package as to how deep they go then I plant them about the depth of the seed themselves. But there are some seeds that need light to germinate and there are seeds that need to be in complete dark to germinate. I can try to come up with a list at some point which need what but right now I will stick to the basics. Most seeds do not need to be in the dark (as in covered with something to not let any light in) and most just need to be planted in the soil. Seeds I know of right away that need light to germinate are snap dragons and alyssum and these you do not cover with anything and just spread them on top of the soil. Anyways some seeds do require some extra attention to grow.
Now on to the soil. Not all soil is created equal. I have learned that the best soil to use is not soil at all. Some people call it a soiless mixture but often it is called potting soil in the store I think. I am trying to think about everything in the mix but I might miss one but the main stuff in the mix is peat, perlite (the little white things that look like rocks) vermicilite, and sometimes a wetting agent depending on the type of mix you buy. Different brands will be different. To tell you the truth I always thought perlite and vermicilite did the same thing and I only recently learned otherwise. Perlite is added to improve drainage in the soil which is sometimes very important for certain plants where vermicilite is added to absorb moisture and retain moisture. I personally buy vermicilite to add extra to the soil mix and that is just something I do and to me it seems to help. As for the wetting agent, it is something that some soil mixes have added to help the mix absorb water. If you have tried different potting soils you may have noticed that some seem to repell water almost where others are not so bad. This is because of the wetting agent which apparently helps the water to get absorbed easier. The reason the water doesn't soak in good is the peat moss in the mix. Even without a wetting agent it is still possible to make the soil wet but it just a little more difficult but not incredibly hard. But sometimes paying a little extra for a better soil can really make a difference in how well the plants grow.
Last but not least-the water and sunlight. When you first plant the seeds it is important to use a spray bottle to water the seeds so you do not wash away the seeds. Once they have sprouted and grown a little bit then it is safe to move to a watering can if you like. Make sure to keep the soil moist but not wet because you can over water and it causes seeds to rot or go mouldy. To be honest I often worry the seeds will not have enough water and I am tempted to add more water thinking I am doing something good but I have to restrain myself because too much will be bad. As for sunlight, it is important to have them by a window or greenhouse if you are starting them indoors. Also as the seeds sprout, make sure to keep an eye on them if they seem to lean towards the window or not. I like to turn the trays when this happens if I start them in a window so they don't get too lopsided. Idealy it would be good to have a window that lets in enough light that they don't reach but it isn't always possible. I know I have only briefly touched on stuff in this post but I hope to get into more detail in the posts to follow about specific stuff. Thanks for reading!
I realize it is too late to start seeds indoors for this season but for some seeds it isn't too late to plant directly outdoors so I will start at the very beginning. I also realize some of this information may be something you already know but for some it may be new information.
Of course to grow seeds you need seeds, soil, tray(s), water and if you are starting them early- a window to put them beside or a greenhouse.
Seeds come in all sizes and as a rule of thumb for me is if there are no definite directions on the package as to how deep they go then I plant them about the depth of the seed themselves. But there are some seeds that need light to germinate and there are seeds that need to be in complete dark to germinate. I can try to come up with a list at some point which need what but right now I will stick to the basics. Most seeds do not need to be in the dark (as in covered with something to not let any light in) and most just need to be planted in the soil. Seeds I know of right away that need light to germinate are snap dragons and alyssum and these you do not cover with anything and just spread them on top of the soil. Anyways some seeds do require some extra attention to grow.
Now on to the soil. Not all soil is created equal. I have learned that the best soil to use is not soil at all. Some people call it a soiless mixture but often it is called potting soil in the store I think. I am trying to think about everything in the mix but I might miss one but the main stuff in the mix is peat, perlite (the little white things that look like rocks) vermicilite, and sometimes a wetting agent depending on the type of mix you buy. Different brands will be different. To tell you the truth I always thought perlite and vermicilite did the same thing and I only recently learned otherwise. Perlite is added to improve drainage in the soil which is sometimes very important for certain plants where vermicilite is added to absorb moisture and retain moisture. I personally buy vermicilite to add extra to the soil mix and that is just something I do and to me it seems to help. As for the wetting agent, it is something that some soil mixes have added to help the mix absorb water. If you have tried different potting soils you may have noticed that some seem to repell water almost where others are not so bad. This is because of the wetting agent which apparently helps the water to get absorbed easier. The reason the water doesn't soak in good is the peat moss in the mix. Even without a wetting agent it is still possible to make the soil wet but it just a little more difficult but not incredibly hard. But sometimes paying a little extra for a better soil can really make a difference in how well the plants grow.
Last but not least-the water and sunlight. When you first plant the seeds it is important to use a spray bottle to water the seeds so you do not wash away the seeds. Once they have sprouted and grown a little bit then it is safe to move to a watering can if you like. Make sure to keep the soil moist but not wet because you can over water and it causes seeds to rot or go mouldy. To be honest I often worry the seeds will not have enough water and I am tempted to add more water thinking I am doing something good but I have to restrain myself because too much will be bad. As for sunlight, it is important to have them by a window or greenhouse if you are starting them indoors. Also as the seeds sprout, make sure to keep an eye on them if they seem to lean towards the window or not. I like to turn the trays when this happens if I start them in a window so they don't get too lopsided. Idealy it would be good to have a window that lets in enough light that they don't reach but it isn't always possible. I know I have only briefly touched on stuff in this post but I hope to get into more detail in the posts to follow about specific stuff. Thanks for reading!
Talking Green
Hello again,
Sorry for the absence first of all. I have been relatively busy when I am able to be and otherwise I have been dealing with my back which continues to cause problems. Anyways that is not the reason for my post today so I will get to the point. Over the winter I convinced my sister to try to grow her own flowers from seed which I do every year. The reason she needed convincing is because she has always considered herself to have a not green thumb-what ever color it would be otherwise is what she felt she had. I convinced her that it was worth a try and could be fun. Plus it would help me out because then I would not need to grow the seeds for her too which would be difficult because of stuff going on right now. Anyways she showed me something through this experience. That I have something to share-well knowledge to share actually. Knowledge that I actually assumed everyone knew because I knew it. But in the process of helping my sister, I realized that I know stuff that could help other people possibly grow better plants. I am not trying to claim I am an expert or anything close to an expert but I know stuff that may help other people out. So when ever I post about this topic I will title it Talking Green and then what ever the title is so that it is easy to find the posts about this. I hope to share something to help someone grow better plants. I will also share about my trials and errors as I learn too which can be funny sometimes. I have my sister to thank for showing me that I have something to share with other people which is important to me. So let's start growing! lol
Sorry for the absence first of all. I have been relatively busy when I am able to be and otherwise I have been dealing with my back which continues to cause problems. Anyways that is not the reason for my post today so I will get to the point. Over the winter I convinced my sister to try to grow her own flowers from seed which I do every year. The reason she needed convincing is because she has always considered herself to have a not green thumb-what ever color it would be otherwise is what she felt she had. I convinced her that it was worth a try and could be fun. Plus it would help me out because then I would not need to grow the seeds for her too which would be difficult because of stuff going on right now. Anyways she showed me something through this experience. That I have something to share-well knowledge to share actually. Knowledge that I actually assumed everyone knew because I knew it. But in the process of helping my sister, I realized that I know stuff that could help other people possibly grow better plants. I am not trying to claim I am an expert or anything close to an expert but I know stuff that may help other people out. So when ever I post about this topic I will title it Talking Green and then what ever the title is so that it is easy to find the posts about this. I hope to share something to help someone grow better plants. I will also share about my trials and errors as I learn too which can be funny sometimes. I have my sister to thank for showing me that I have something to share with other people which is important to me. So let's start growing! lol
Sunday, April 25, 2010
A NEW TOY!!!!!
Hi again,
I would like to begin by apologizing for my absense but I have not really had alot to blog about in the last while. I have been dealing with alot of extra pain and unable to spend very much time on the computer. But today I have something I am so very excited about and I have to share!!!! We got a new toy and I am sooooo excited about it!!!!! Let me tell you about it! We got a Mastercraft Maximum Scroll Saw with digital read out! But that is not all! It has a variable speed of 400-1600 spm which is way more than our little 2 speed scroll saw! The variable speed is a nice knob that you can turn while it is on to change the speed. It has a 16in throat capacity where our old saw only has 10in! One of my favorite features on this saw though other than the digital feature is the tool free blade change!!! Oh I am so excited about that! Our old saw was a pain to change the blade! This new saw also has a 2in thickness cutting capacity which is also better I believe than our old saw. But do you think the instructions were read before it was turned on? lol nope. We do read the instructions but it isn't fun. Today the instructions were tossed around to people to read them but no one wanted to read them. It was on sale for 99.00 and save 130.00 so it is regularly priced at 230.00!!!! My mom said happy belated birthday. lol I had my birthday about a month ago but I could not think of anything for gifts that I needed. I can not tell you how extremely excited I am about this new saw!!! It is going to be so much fun!!! I am not one to want alot but every so often I see something that is just something amazing! I hope to use this to make some money for myself if I can find something that I can sell. So it isn't just for pleasure purposes but I am sure going to enjoy using it!!! Here are a couple of pictures of our new toy!!!
Brand Spanking New right out of the box!!!
PS-I know it is Mastercraft and a Canadian Tire (aka to most as Crappy Tire) brand but it is the Mastercraft maximum and we have had good luck with stuff in the maximum line mostly. For the price we paid-you can't go wrong really. Here's hoping it doesn't break and we have to deal with Crappy Tire's customer service which is less than pleasent. lol
I would like to begin by apologizing for my absense but I have not really had alot to blog about in the last while. I have been dealing with alot of extra pain and unable to spend very much time on the computer. But today I have something I am so very excited about and I have to share!!!! We got a new toy and I am sooooo excited about it!!!!! Let me tell you about it! We got a Mastercraft Maximum Scroll Saw with digital read out! But that is not all! It has a variable speed of 400-1600 spm which is way more than our little 2 speed scroll saw! The variable speed is a nice knob that you can turn while it is on to change the speed. It has a 16in throat capacity where our old saw only has 10in! One of my favorite features on this saw though other than the digital feature is the tool free blade change!!! Oh I am so excited about that! Our old saw was a pain to change the blade! This new saw also has a 2in thickness cutting capacity which is also better I believe than our old saw. But do you think the instructions were read before it was turned on? lol nope. We do read the instructions but it isn't fun. Today the instructions were tossed around to people to read them but no one wanted to read them. It was on sale for 99.00 and save 130.00 so it is regularly priced at 230.00!!!! My mom said happy belated birthday. lol I had my birthday about a month ago but I could not think of anything for gifts that I needed. I can not tell you how extremely excited I am about this new saw!!! It is going to be so much fun!!! I am not one to want alot but every so often I see something that is just something amazing! I hope to use this to make some money for myself if I can find something that I can sell. So it isn't just for pleasure purposes but I am sure going to enjoy using it!!! Here are a couple of pictures of our new toy!!!
Brand Spanking New right out of the box!!!
PS-I know it is Mastercraft and a Canadian Tire (aka to most as Crappy Tire) brand but it is the Mastercraft maximum and we have had good luck with stuff in the maximum line mostly. For the price we paid-you can't go wrong really. Here's hoping it doesn't break and we have to deal with Crappy Tire's customer service which is less than pleasent. lol
Thursday, April 8, 2010
2012 the movie
Hi again,
Well I feel world destruction movies are just one of those movies a person just has to see. lol Either to mock it and laugh at it or to enjoy it. To see what is new in terms of how the world is destroyed and what not. lol I have to say this one was better than The Day After Tomorrow but I am not saying it was great. I feel it went on way too long and it sort of got kind of boring after a bit. The first half was good but after that it felt dragged out and just stuff being destroyed. Also I found that it was a little bit funny and unrealistic how the main characters always had luck to get through stuff just in the nick of time where everyone else parished. Something else that bothered me was how religions were shown in the movie such as Christianity, Catholisism and Budhism but the movie gave the impression that God didn't exist and that all the religions were fake really. The impression I got was the world was falling apart and there was no god to save anyone and everyone was on their own. Not a very pleasent feeling. I suppose this movie was actually unique in the sense it included religion in some ways in the movie where usually other destruction movies leave religion out of it for the most part. So because of the length of the movie and the whole religion thing, I have to say I was not too impressed with it. But it was funny and the action was good though it got a little boring after awhile.
Well I feel world destruction movies are just one of those movies a person just has to see. lol Either to mock it and laugh at it or to enjoy it. To see what is new in terms of how the world is destroyed and what not. lol I have to say this one was better than The Day After Tomorrow but I am not saying it was great. I feel it went on way too long and it sort of got kind of boring after a bit. The first half was good but after that it felt dragged out and just stuff being destroyed. Also I found that it was a little bit funny and unrealistic how the main characters always had luck to get through stuff just in the nick of time where everyone else parished. Something else that bothered me was how religions were shown in the movie such as Christianity, Catholisism and Budhism but the movie gave the impression that God didn't exist and that all the religions were fake really. The impression I got was the world was falling apart and there was no god to save anyone and everyone was on their own. Not a very pleasent feeling. I suppose this movie was actually unique in the sense it included religion in some ways in the movie where usually other destruction movies leave religion out of it for the most part. So because of the length of the movie and the whole religion thing, I have to say I was not too impressed with it. But it was funny and the action was good though it got a little boring after awhile.
What I've been up to.
Hello again on this blustery snowy day. My goodness it isn't pretty but snowstorms never are. Snow falling can be pretty but storms are not. This one is a bit ugly. During the news they reported that an area of Alberta already had three seperate car pile ups that contained about 30-40 vehicles each. The roads are really bad. I hope everyone is ok despite the accidents.
Ok so I have been absent for a fair bit and I apologize. It is largely due to my back and alot of pain I have been experiencing sadly. It has kept me away from sitting at the computer alot. But I have managed to do some stuff that I would still like to blog about despite it being a bit late. So here is what I have been up to the past few weeks.
I guess the first thing that I would like to blog about is the farthest back and that would be my birthday! On March 28th. I have mixed feelings about birthdays now and this year was better than my last but still a bit painful. lol My brother in law called it my quarter life crisis last year and I suppose that is a good name for it. I am sadly nearing 30yrs old and my plans that I had for my life have not happened and quite often that is very depressing to me but I try to remind myself that my life just took a different turn (or many) than I had planned on and I just have to deal with it and move on. I can't feel my life is over because I am getting close to 30 and I haven't gotten married or started a family or even gotten my own place. I have been through alot and I suppose I can be proud of myself for making it through what I have. In the grand scheme of things my life is what I have lived and sometimes it isn't what I planned and it doesn't mean that my life was put on hold or my life is passing by. I can't say why or for what reason I have gone through the stuff I have and some say God allows the stuff to make us stronger but I don't know. All I do know is that I need to make the most of what I have because this is my life and if I do not then I will regret it. It isn't to say that I live the best I can all the time and I do get depressed sometimes but I try not to. Anyways back to my birthday. I had a good time with my family and we went to Tony Romas where I got a free meal for my birthday and then we went to Movie Gallery and got a free movie for my birthday also! Birthday freebies make a birthday more worth going through don't you think? lol We rented 2012. lol What can I say? It is just one of those movies you have to see to either mock and laugh at or enjoy. I would like to blog about this movie further so I will leave it at that for now. I also got a chocolate cake which was yummy. It HAS to be chocolate. lol
My Birthday cake
My birthday cake redone. lol We couldn't leave it looking like an Easter cake could we? lol
I suppose the next thing I would like to talk about is my trip to London Drugs. lol I made another trip there on March 31 to use up coupons expiring on March 31. So I paid 6.00 and used 17.00 in coupons and it would have been even better but the Flameless Luminaire candles were out of stock sadly. I could have gotten it free which was 18.00 in coupons but sometimes sad things happen to good coupons. lol
Next up is Easter! I made a card for my family, I decorated an egg using Ukranian decorating methods for my family and we went to a church in town. The Ukranian egg took quite awhile because I can't sit up for very long periods at a time but I managed to get it done before Easter! Pictures are at the bottom of this post. I would like to talk about the church for a moment. I don't mean to be mean but the people seemed to be half asleep. I mean it is Easter and the songs were about Christ rising from the dead and us being saved and everything and it is so amazing and people just didn't seem to have any excitement. Is it odd to think that people would be excited about it? But this is probably the way that the people in this church worship and everyone has their own way of worshiping so I shouldn't be rude about it. The sermon was ok but I found myself questioning a bit of what he said. I suppose it is good to question what is said? I don't mean to be offensive but it all bothered me. I don't want to sound judgemental either-I don't know these people so I probably should stop at this. On a lighter note, I also made an Easter bunny cake and it is a bit of a tradition in our house and I will post a pic of it. It was chocolate of course. lol
Lastly, I had another appointment with my specialist on Monday. It went fairly well but I have to get another brace and that is not what I hoped to hear. Though I also knew that I have been dealing with alot of extra pain lately and that something wasn't quite right. I also got to see my nephew and my sister and broter in law and they are all doing well and my nephew is growing soooo much!!! He is almost 4 months old and he will stand on our lap and we just have to support him. He loves to look at things and examine them and I think he is very smart! lol Maybe I am biased. lol The sad part is that because of Sunday and Monday, my back got in terrible shape and by Monday night I was in a ton of pain and was getting multiple spasms in my back at the same time and was very unpleasent. I spent most of Tuesday and Wednesday laying down trying to gain back my energy and get my back to calm down. In some ways it is funny because on Tuesday I was moving more like a 80yr old because I was in so much pain and so stiff. The stiffness of course is helped by moving around which I tried to do without causing too many spasms. Ok so I think I am basically caught up now! lol I also learned that the RCMP have now closed the highway. You know the weather is bad when the roads get closed. Well thanks for reading!
The Easter Bunny Cake we make each year-I like to get creative a bit with it. lol
I also decorated an egg using Ukranian decorating methods. I am not really great at it but I enjoy it.
Ok so I have been absent for a fair bit and I apologize. It is largely due to my back and alot of pain I have been experiencing sadly. It has kept me away from sitting at the computer alot. But I have managed to do some stuff that I would still like to blog about despite it being a bit late. So here is what I have been up to the past few weeks.
I guess the first thing that I would like to blog about is the farthest back and that would be my birthday! On March 28th. I have mixed feelings about birthdays now and this year was better than my last but still a bit painful. lol My brother in law called it my quarter life crisis last year and I suppose that is a good name for it. I am sadly nearing 30yrs old and my plans that I had for my life have not happened and quite often that is very depressing to me but I try to remind myself that my life just took a different turn (or many) than I had planned on and I just have to deal with it and move on. I can't feel my life is over because I am getting close to 30 and I haven't gotten married or started a family or even gotten my own place. I have been through alot and I suppose I can be proud of myself for making it through what I have. In the grand scheme of things my life is what I have lived and sometimes it isn't what I planned and it doesn't mean that my life was put on hold or my life is passing by. I can't say why or for what reason I have gone through the stuff I have and some say God allows the stuff to make us stronger but I don't know. All I do know is that I need to make the most of what I have because this is my life and if I do not then I will regret it. It isn't to say that I live the best I can all the time and I do get depressed sometimes but I try not to. Anyways back to my birthday. I had a good time with my family and we went to Tony Romas where I got a free meal for my birthday and then we went to Movie Gallery and got a free movie for my birthday also! Birthday freebies make a birthday more worth going through don't you think? lol We rented 2012. lol What can I say? It is just one of those movies you have to see to either mock and laugh at or enjoy. I would like to blog about this movie further so I will leave it at that for now. I also got a chocolate cake which was yummy. It HAS to be chocolate. lol
My Birthday cake
My birthday cake redone. lol We couldn't leave it looking like an Easter cake could we? lol
I suppose the next thing I would like to talk about is my trip to London Drugs. lol I made another trip there on March 31 to use up coupons expiring on March 31. So I paid 6.00 and used 17.00 in coupons and it would have been even better but the Flameless Luminaire candles were out of stock sadly. I could have gotten it free which was 18.00 in coupons but sometimes sad things happen to good coupons. lol
Next up is Easter! I made a card for my family, I decorated an egg using Ukranian decorating methods for my family and we went to a church in town. The Ukranian egg took quite awhile because I can't sit up for very long periods at a time but I managed to get it done before Easter! Pictures are at the bottom of this post. I would like to talk about the church for a moment. I don't mean to be mean but the people seemed to be half asleep. I mean it is Easter and the songs were about Christ rising from the dead and us being saved and everything and it is so amazing and people just didn't seem to have any excitement. Is it odd to think that people would be excited about it? But this is probably the way that the people in this church worship and everyone has their own way of worshiping so I shouldn't be rude about it. The sermon was ok but I found myself questioning a bit of what he said. I suppose it is good to question what is said? I don't mean to be offensive but it all bothered me. I don't want to sound judgemental either-I don't know these people so I probably should stop at this. On a lighter note, I also made an Easter bunny cake and it is a bit of a tradition in our house and I will post a pic of it. It was chocolate of course. lol
Lastly, I had another appointment with my specialist on Monday. It went fairly well but I have to get another brace and that is not what I hoped to hear. Though I also knew that I have been dealing with alot of extra pain lately and that something wasn't quite right. I also got to see my nephew and my sister and broter in law and they are all doing well and my nephew is growing soooo much!!! He is almost 4 months old and he will stand on our lap and we just have to support him. He loves to look at things and examine them and I think he is very smart! lol Maybe I am biased. lol The sad part is that because of Sunday and Monday, my back got in terrible shape and by Monday night I was in a ton of pain and was getting multiple spasms in my back at the same time and was very unpleasent. I spent most of Tuesday and Wednesday laying down trying to gain back my energy and get my back to calm down. In some ways it is funny because on Tuesday I was moving more like a 80yr old because I was in so much pain and so stiff. The stiffness of course is helped by moving around which I tried to do without causing too many spasms. Ok so I think I am basically caught up now! lol I also learned that the RCMP have now closed the highway. You know the weather is bad when the roads get closed. Well thanks for reading!
The Easter Bunny Cake we make each year-I like to get creative a bit with it. lol
I also decorated an egg using Ukranian decorating methods. I am not really great at it but I enjoy it.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Week in review. lol
Hi again,
Well I haven't been on here much this week and there was a few things I had wanted to blog about but instead I will just try to keep it short and share about a few different things.
First off, on the weekend I tried an A&W chicken grill deluxe I think it is called and I thought it would be good to blog about food too. I have never tried this burger before and I had a coupon so I thought hey why not. It was very good! It is on a whole wheat bun I believe and there is quite a big chunk of chicken that has the same seasoning as the Chubby Chicken which is tasty. Also it had light ranch sauce which was a good choice and tomato. All in all it was quite good!
On Wednesday we went to Edmonton and visited my nephew who is so adorable and sweet and strong! He is 3months old and already sitting completely on his own and will try to stand on your lap! Yesterday apparently he turned from his back to his side on his own also. I think he will be walking in no time! lol I feel bad for my sister already. lol Also we had lunch at my sister's and I asked for crackers for the soup and they were rancid but I can't smell so I put them in the soup and started eating... oh it was bad! Not my sister's fault-they were not very old. But some days I wish I had a sense of smell that I could tell if crackers are rancid or milk is sour... yeah I have had sour milk a few times too. Not fun.
I found out that you should never close the car door before making sure that your mp3 earphones are out of the way. lol They didn't fare so well against the car door. Luckily we have an extra pair so I lucked out. Ooops.
I went in yesterday for stuff that I needed to get and I managed to get almost free Tylenol! The tylenol Muscles Aches and body pain was on sale for 6.99 and I had 3 different 2.00 off coupons and because London Drugs allows stacking-I was able to get 6.00 off! so .99 for Tylenol that is normally about 10.00 I think is not bad! lol Who says you can't get good deals with coupons? Several people do actually but they don't know how to use them properly. Sorry but it is true. If you feel coupons do not save money and they are not worth your time-you have not figured out how to use them properly. I regularely get good deals on stuff so it isn't a fluke. I am just saying. I get rather annoyed when people try to tell me that coupons are bad and a waste of time and don't save money.
The last thing about this week is something I know very well but love! Warm weather happened this week! Double digit temps on Monday!!! I think the first double digit temps in quite awhile here. To sit in that warm sun was just amazing!! Then the temps tanked and we had snow on Thursday. lol Welcome to March! The weather in March (and even April) is such a rollercoaster! You can't put away your winter jacket but you have to dig out your spring jacket also so you can switch back and forth-sometimes even in the same day. But I love it! It means warmer weather is coming!
Ok that is the jyst of this week. It wasn't a busy week I suppose. My back has kept me down so much this week that I have not been able to do much. Keeps me out of trouble too I suppose. lol
Well I haven't been on here much this week and there was a few things I had wanted to blog about but instead I will just try to keep it short and share about a few different things.
First off, on the weekend I tried an A&W chicken grill deluxe I think it is called and I thought it would be good to blog about food too. I have never tried this burger before and I had a coupon so I thought hey why not. It was very good! It is on a whole wheat bun I believe and there is quite a big chunk of chicken that has the same seasoning as the Chubby Chicken which is tasty. Also it had light ranch sauce which was a good choice and tomato. All in all it was quite good!
On Wednesday we went to Edmonton and visited my nephew who is so adorable and sweet and strong! He is 3months old and already sitting completely on his own and will try to stand on your lap! Yesterday apparently he turned from his back to his side on his own also. I think he will be walking in no time! lol I feel bad for my sister already. lol Also we had lunch at my sister's and I asked for crackers for the soup and they were rancid but I can't smell so I put them in the soup and started eating... oh it was bad! Not my sister's fault-they were not very old. But some days I wish I had a sense of smell that I could tell if crackers are rancid or milk is sour... yeah I have had sour milk a few times too. Not fun.
I found out that you should never close the car door before making sure that your mp3 earphones are out of the way. lol They didn't fare so well against the car door. Luckily we have an extra pair so I lucked out. Ooops.
I went in yesterday for stuff that I needed to get and I managed to get almost free Tylenol! The tylenol Muscles Aches and body pain was on sale for 6.99 and I had 3 different 2.00 off coupons and because London Drugs allows stacking-I was able to get 6.00 off! so .99 for Tylenol that is normally about 10.00 I think is not bad! lol Who says you can't get good deals with coupons? Several people do actually but they don't know how to use them properly. Sorry but it is true. If you feel coupons do not save money and they are not worth your time-you have not figured out how to use them properly. I regularely get good deals on stuff so it isn't a fluke. I am just saying. I get rather annoyed when people try to tell me that coupons are bad and a waste of time and don't save money.
The last thing about this week is something I know very well but love! Warm weather happened this week! Double digit temps on Monday!!! I think the first double digit temps in quite awhile here. To sit in that warm sun was just amazing!! Then the temps tanked and we had snow on Thursday. lol Welcome to March! The weather in March (and even April) is such a rollercoaster! You can't put away your winter jacket but you have to dig out your spring jacket also so you can switch back and forth-sometimes even in the same day. But I love it! It means warmer weather is coming!
Ok that is the jyst of this week. It wasn't a busy week I suppose. My back has kept me down so much this week that I have not been able to do much. Keeps me out of trouble too I suppose. lol
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Pulling back a bit
Hi again,
The past few days I have been thinking about how much I share on here and whether it is too much or not. I have been trying to be open and trying to share experiences but I am wondering if I have been too open. For most of my life I have preferred to keep quiet about my personal stuff even to the point that I was afraid to ask for a prayer request when I was sick because I would have to share that I was sick and then the whole church would have known. I am not talking the flu though-I am talking about being sick that I made trips to the ER type sick. Anyways I thought I needed to change and be more open but I think I went from one extreme to the other and I have been too open. I have been feeling pretty exposed almost and I hate that feeling. One time I had opened up to someone and I trusted them and then I felt exposed and ended up wanting to run away and hide and move away to some remote island even though it was probably less than I have shared on here. I felt embarrassed and like the person could see right through me and even though that person may not have had problems with it-I did. I wanted to go back and erase all the moments where I had shared and I wanted to take it all back. I was so uncomfortable. I want to be more open and be more normal but I don't know if I know the acceptable limit is and where it becomes too much. I am learning though. I am not sure if I have shared too much here or not and if people will be happy that I am pulling back a bit but I am. lol I have even thought about erasing certain posts but I will leave them for now. I actually feel a little clueless right now on what should and should not be shared. I suppose that is what I get for keeping so much to myself for so long. Well I need to go to bed now! I am exhausted. Thanks for reading.
The past few days I have been thinking about how much I share on here and whether it is too much or not. I have been trying to be open and trying to share experiences but I am wondering if I have been too open. For most of my life I have preferred to keep quiet about my personal stuff even to the point that I was afraid to ask for a prayer request when I was sick because I would have to share that I was sick and then the whole church would have known. I am not talking the flu though-I am talking about being sick that I made trips to the ER type sick. Anyways I thought I needed to change and be more open but I think I went from one extreme to the other and I have been too open. I have been feeling pretty exposed almost and I hate that feeling. One time I had opened up to someone and I trusted them and then I felt exposed and ended up wanting to run away and hide and move away to some remote island even though it was probably less than I have shared on here. I felt embarrassed and like the person could see right through me and even though that person may not have had problems with it-I did. I wanted to go back and erase all the moments where I had shared and I wanted to take it all back. I was so uncomfortable. I want to be more open and be more normal but I don't know if I know the acceptable limit is and where it becomes too much. I am learning though. I am not sure if I have shared too much here or not and if people will be happy that I am pulling back a bit but I am. lol I have even thought about erasing certain posts but I will leave them for now. I actually feel a little clueless right now on what should and should not be shared. I suppose that is what I get for keeping so much to myself for so long. Well I need to go to bed now! I am exhausted. Thanks for reading.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Hello again
Hi again,
Wow it's been a rough few days! Since last Thursday I have been having more pain than usual in my back which has managed to keep me down a fair bit which in turn has kept me off of here mostly. I am not sure what is going on exactly but I have luckily been able to manage the pain on just extra strength Tylenol. I hate taking so much tylenol but some days it is all I can do to keep going. Thankfully I have alot of coupons for Tylenol and London Drugs that I can get tylenol practically free! lol Always a positve in everything right? LOL I did manage groceries today and some much needed shopping on Saturday though which was great! I paid for Saturday's trip yesterday and spent alot more time down but I got through almost an entire book and also started on the 3rd book of Twilight! If there is one thing I try to do-it is try to make the most of what ever situation I am in. Sometimes it is tough but I think I manage ok. I just can't stop living because of pain. I love to read and when I get stuck in bed it is almost nice because then I have an excuse to stay in one spot and read. lol There are no other places to be because I can't be so there are no distractions either. Just me and a great book! I have a few things I would love to blog about from the last few days but it will have to wait till my back improves a bit more that I can sit at the computer more. Thanks for reading!!!
Wow it's been a rough few days! Since last Thursday I have been having more pain than usual in my back which has managed to keep me down a fair bit which in turn has kept me off of here mostly. I am not sure what is going on exactly but I have luckily been able to manage the pain on just extra strength Tylenol. I hate taking so much tylenol but some days it is all I can do to keep going. Thankfully I have alot of coupons for Tylenol and London Drugs that I can get tylenol practically free! lol Always a positve in everything right? LOL I did manage groceries today and some much needed shopping on Saturday though which was great! I paid for Saturday's trip yesterday and spent alot more time down but I got through almost an entire book and also started on the 3rd book of Twilight! If there is one thing I try to do-it is try to make the most of what ever situation I am in. Sometimes it is tough but I think I manage ok. I just can't stop living because of pain. I love to read and when I get stuck in bed it is almost nice because then I have an excuse to stay in one spot and read. lol There are no other places to be because I can't be so there are no distractions either. Just me and a great book! I have a few things I would love to blog about from the last few days but it will have to wait till my back improves a bit more that I can sit at the computer more. Thanks for reading!!!
Saturday, March 13, 2010
My cat on the Treadmill
Hi again,
Just thought I would share a video of my kitty my mom found back again! It is really cute and kind of funny! Enjoy! Felix on the Treadmill
Just thought I would share a video of my kitty my mom found back again! It is really cute and kind of funny! Enjoy! Felix on the Treadmill
Friday, March 12, 2010
Pictures!!
Hi again,
Well here are pictures as promised of my room so far. The key word is so far! there is still alot to be done.
My desk I have had for years. was too small.
My new desk!!!! It is a desk my dad made for the office but it isn't needed there anymore and so I got it!!! YAY! I love it!
My new craft table!! where I can make my cards and scrapbooking and what not!! Yay!!! I have wanted this for so long!!! My dad made this one also-it matches the desk!
Well here are pictures as promised of my room so far. The key word is so far! there is still alot to be done.
My desk I have had for years. was too small.
My new desk!!!! It is a desk my dad made for the office but it isn't needed there anymore and so I got it!!! YAY! I love it!
My new craft table!! where I can make my cards and scrapbooking and what not!! Yay!!! I have wanted this for so long!!! My dad made this one also-it matches the desk!
Thursday, March 11, 2010
What a Day!!!
Hi again,
Well I was wondering why I woke up so early this morning-maybe it was to help me fit in all I did today? lol All the rearranging and more rearranging and then nope doesn't work so moved stuff again... then trying to figure out how to get stuff where it had to go and what to move first... lol it has certainly been a process! all in a day's work I suppose? lol I can post pics maybe still. Stuff is still so chaotic that it will take more time still but I have lots of that. lol Oddly I seem to fill up any free time I have with stuff and I can still find more that I want to do but have no time for!! lol I am in the process of trying to come up with something that I can make money on that I can start to get my independance back and have some income and getting stuff done in my room is important so I have a good space to figure that out and do what ever I decide to do. I definitely have my own desk space now to work which will make such a difference in helping me to find a way to make some money. I used to have my own business way back before I was forced to quit working and I know that it is important to have proper space and organization to accomplish everything. I was baking Natural dog biscuits before it was a popular thing and before there was really anything natural/organic for pets in the average store. It was very successful and I just sold at the farmer's market each week so I didn't have a building to pay rent on and kept costs low. Anyways when my back and a whole lot of other issues got worse, I was forced to give up my business and the full time job I was working also. I was attempting to "get ahead" despite my physical problems. I laugh now thinking back to 2004 which is the year I was the busiest-I had absolutely no life and I never watched tv and I was constantly working. I litterally had like 16hr days where I put in my 8hrs at my job and then 8hrs with my business. Then throw in back problems and some other physical stuff and I burned out big time. I felt as if I was juggling all these balls and I could not let one drop or absolutely everything would crash around me. Then one day it finally did. I vowed to myself after that happened that I would never get myself that busy again that I would go through that all over again. I think part of me was trying to get ahead to prove to myself or someone that I could be somebody and to me somebody looked like someone who was successful and I was prepared to kill myself trying I guess. Though I don't think I set out thinking I am going to do this even if it kills me... Anyways, I did learn a lesson then and I hopefully will never forget it. I have also learned that living and family is way more important and I need to balance work and family. I am itching to get working so bad though. lol just to be able to support myself again and have that independance back. Well that said, I am on my way to getting back into making money by getting myself set up. Just to be able to make money that I can look at and know that I earned it and be able to support myself. Anyways I should go. I am exhausted! I think through the past 5yrs I have actually learned better how to pace myself that I know when to stop and rest. My body is not the same as some other people's and I do have limitations and denying that is only going to make things worse. As much as I push my body to work the way I want it to-I can't make it do things that it just can not do. I think everyone knows that! lol Somedays I wish I could make it through an entire day or even 8hrs with out resting but I can't so I just have to adjust and move on. Sorry, I have just been thinking alot about all of this lately as I venture towards making money again. Thanks for reading.
Well I was wondering why I woke up so early this morning-maybe it was to help me fit in all I did today? lol All the rearranging and more rearranging and then nope doesn't work so moved stuff again... then trying to figure out how to get stuff where it had to go and what to move first... lol it has certainly been a process! all in a day's work I suppose? lol I can post pics maybe still. Stuff is still so chaotic that it will take more time still but I have lots of that. lol Oddly I seem to fill up any free time I have with stuff and I can still find more that I want to do but have no time for!! lol I am in the process of trying to come up with something that I can make money on that I can start to get my independance back and have some income and getting stuff done in my room is important so I have a good space to figure that out and do what ever I decide to do. I definitely have my own desk space now to work which will make such a difference in helping me to find a way to make some money. I used to have my own business way back before I was forced to quit working and I know that it is important to have proper space and organization to accomplish everything. I was baking Natural dog biscuits before it was a popular thing and before there was really anything natural/organic for pets in the average store. It was very successful and I just sold at the farmer's market each week so I didn't have a building to pay rent on and kept costs low. Anyways when my back and a whole lot of other issues got worse, I was forced to give up my business and the full time job I was working also. I was attempting to "get ahead" despite my physical problems. I laugh now thinking back to 2004 which is the year I was the busiest-I had absolutely no life and I never watched tv and I was constantly working. I litterally had like 16hr days where I put in my 8hrs at my job and then 8hrs with my business. Then throw in back problems and some other physical stuff and I burned out big time. I felt as if I was juggling all these balls and I could not let one drop or absolutely everything would crash around me. Then one day it finally did. I vowed to myself after that happened that I would never get myself that busy again that I would go through that all over again. I think part of me was trying to get ahead to prove to myself or someone that I could be somebody and to me somebody looked like someone who was successful and I was prepared to kill myself trying I guess. Though I don't think I set out thinking I am going to do this even if it kills me... Anyways, I did learn a lesson then and I hopefully will never forget it. I have also learned that living and family is way more important and I need to balance work and family. I am itching to get working so bad though. lol just to be able to support myself again and have that independance back. Well that said, I am on my way to getting back into making money by getting myself set up. Just to be able to make money that I can look at and know that I earned it and be able to support myself. Anyways I should go. I am exhausted! I think through the past 5yrs I have actually learned better how to pace myself that I know when to stop and rest. My body is not the same as some other people's and I do have limitations and denying that is only going to make things worse. As much as I push my body to work the way I want it to-I can't make it do things that it just can not do. I think everyone knows that! lol Somedays I wish I could make it through an entire day or even 8hrs with out resting but I can't so I just have to adjust and move on. Sorry, I have just been thinking alot about all of this lately as I venture towards making money again. Thanks for reading.
Organized Mess?? lol
Hi again,
Well I am continuing to organize myself in my new room and it is challenging. For anyone wondering-I still have to live at home because of physical challenges and my old room was falling apart along with like half the house so my parents are doing a major reno and I am in my new room now. I am enjoying my new room-no drafts or mice running along the floor. lol Yep we had a mouse problem. My dad is amazing-he is doing all the work himself. He can build anything and does and he is smart too. Anyways back to my organized mess. lol I am supposed to get a different desk still and a craft table and so I have had to move stuff around first to get the table in here and so stuff is everywhere! But it is organized in piles despite the cat trying to sabotage my efforts! lol But now I am supposed to get my desk too... This will be fun. Anyways my room is absolutely turned upside down but the funny thing is I know where everything is still. lol So it may sound odd to have an organized mess but apparently I have it down pat. I just hate clutter and so I am ready to pull out my hair but that is another story entirely. lol Wish me luck that I keep my sanity during this time. LOL
Well I am continuing to organize myself in my new room and it is challenging. For anyone wondering-I still have to live at home because of physical challenges and my old room was falling apart along with like half the house so my parents are doing a major reno and I am in my new room now. I am enjoying my new room-no drafts or mice running along the floor. lol Yep we had a mouse problem. My dad is amazing-he is doing all the work himself. He can build anything and does and he is smart too. Anyways back to my organized mess. lol I am supposed to get a different desk still and a craft table and so I have had to move stuff around first to get the table in here and so stuff is everywhere! But it is organized in piles despite the cat trying to sabotage my efforts! lol But now I am supposed to get my desk too... This will be fun. Anyways my room is absolutely turned upside down but the funny thing is I know where everything is still. lol So it may sound odd to have an organized mess but apparently I have it down pat. I just hate clutter and so I am ready to pull out my hair but that is another story entirely. lol Wish me luck that I keep my sanity during this time. LOL
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Trust
Hi again,
Trust. This is something I struggle with immensely. I don't trust really at all and I am almost always second guessing people and their actions or words. I am trying to be open in the attempt to prove to myself that I can trust but I think being open and trusting are actually 2 different things entirely. I suppose being open I have to trust that people won't hate me when they learn more about who I am but it isn't exactly trust. The latest example of not trusting people I think would be that I am attempting to send an email to someone and apparently it is not coming through but any other emails I send asking if it came through the person says that those came through. Hmm...I think anyone would start to wonder with this one but me especially right off the bat I assumed this person was not being honest. But I don't say that because I suppose even I am not completely honest in terms of I don't want to accuse anyone unless I have some more to go on. So I just keep trying to send the message and I continue to not trust this person in terms of how honest this person is being. I do not have any clue how to fix this but I am trying. I suppose it is also a bit of paranoia also. Though I think I am getting better at trusting people enough to be more open. It is still a struggle but I am getting better at it. I actually think blogging is making it easier for me. lol At first when I first started blogging-I was terrified of being open about myself but that is why I did this to help myself as well as share about myself and the struggles and joys I go through that it may help others. It is important to face fear. Sometimes it is difficult but I think the harder it is-the more important to overcome it. Thanks for reading!
Trust. This is something I struggle with immensely. I don't trust really at all and I am almost always second guessing people and their actions or words. I am trying to be open in the attempt to prove to myself that I can trust but I think being open and trusting are actually 2 different things entirely. I suppose being open I have to trust that people won't hate me when they learn more about who I am but it isn't exactly trust. The latest example of not trusting people I think would be that I am attempting to send an email to someone and apparently it is not coming through but any other emails I send asking if it came through the person says that those came through. Hmm...I think anyone would start to wonder with this one but me especially right off the bat I assumed this person was not being honest. But I don't say that because I suppose even I am not completely honest in terms of I don't want to accuse anyone unless I have some more to go on. So I just keep trying to send the message and I continue to not trust this person in terms of how honest this person is being. I do not have any clue how to fix this but I am trying. I suppose it is also a bit of paranoia also. Though I think I am getting better at trusting people enough to be more open. It is still a struggle but I am getting better at it. I actually think blogging is making it easier for me. lol At first when I first started blogging-I was terrified of being open about myself but that is why I did this to help myself as well as share about myself and the struggles and joys I go through that it may help others. It is important to face fear. Sometimes it is difficult but I think the harder it is-the more important to overcome it. Thanks for reading!
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Making Paper-part 2!
Ok so here are the pics as promised!!!
First step in my grand venture of making paper! lol I grabbed some shredded paper from our paper shredder and stuck a bunch into a tub I found to use. I noticed on the instructions it says newsprint or flyers but I am going to try to use printer paper since we have so much of it in the shredder. wish me luck!
Paper soaking in about 4cups warm water. Hoping this is enough water!
After I soaked the paper shreds in water for close to an hour, I stuck enough in to fill the blender about half full. it instructed to only add half a cup of liquid but as I found out-you need to add a ton more than that or the blender can't get it blended together.
Thirsty anyone?? LOL a nice soupy goopy sloppy substance. lol I wonder if I did this right? lol I added blue food coloring also to the blender to make it blue.
YUMMM!! LOL anyone hungry? lol Dumped from the blender into the strainer to strain off the excess liquid. Looks like a science experiment now. lol
Now the excess liquid has been strained off I dumped it on a piece of flannel as instructed to do in the instructions. Crossing my fingers. lol
Rolling out the pulpy stuff and hoping it is going to work. lol
Newly made paper drying by the woodstove.
So that last pic was taken around 4pm or so and since then it has dried a fair bit but still wet. Thank goodnes for the woodstove though! It really got the drying process going alot quicker. I will take another picture in the morning of it and hopefully it is basically dry tomorrow. Currently it is about the thickness of cardboard so I didn't roll it out thin enough but it was starting to rip when I got to this thickness so I am not sure I can get it any thinner. I am also thinking that maybe newsprint would work better maybe so that will be my next venture. This has been alot of fun and I am wondering if anything will come of this or if it was a fun experiment that I just learned from. lol Anyways that is all for now and thanks for reading!!
First step in my grand venture of making paper! lol I grabbed some shredded paper from our paper shredder and stuck a bunch into a tub I found to use. I noticed on the instructions it says newsprint or flyers but I am going to try to use printer paper since we have so much of it in the shredder. wish me luck!
Paper soaking in about 4cups warm water. Hoping this is enough water!
After I soaked the paper shreds in water for close to an hour, I stuck enough in to fill the blender about half full. it instructed to only add half a cup of liquid but as I found out-you need to add a ton more than that or the blender can't get it blended together.
Thirsty anyone?? LOL a nice soupy goopy sloppy substance. lol I wonder if I did this right? lol I added blue food coloring also to the blender to make it blue.
YUMMM!! LOL anyone hungry? lol Dumped from the blender into the strainer to strain off the excess liquid. Looks like a science experiment now. lol
Now the excess liquid has been strained off I dumped it on a piece of flannel as instructed to do in the instructions. Crossing my fingers. lol
Rolling out the pulpy stuff and hoping it is going to work. lol
Newly made paper drying by the woodstove.
So that last pic was taken around 4pm or so and since then it has dried a fair bit but still wet. Thank goodnes for the woodstove though! It really got the drying process going alot quicker. I will take another picture in the morning of it and hopefully it is basically dry tomorrow. Currently it is about the thickness of cardboard so I didn't roll it out thin enough but it was starting to rip when I got to this thickness so I am not sure I can get it any thinner. I am also thinking that maybe newsprint would work better maybe so that will be my next venture. This has been alot of fun and I am wondering if anything will come of this or if it was a fun experiment that I just learned from. lol Anyways that is all for now and thanks for reading!!
Making Paper!!!
Hi again,
Well today I am trying something I have wanted to try for quite awhile but never knew how to do it and haven't found a recipe so to speak on how to do it. Well I got an email from Canadian Living and there is an article on how to make paper from paper you would normally toss-hopefully in the recycling bin. :) I just can't believe how much paper enters our home each week and it would be nice to be able to use it somehow. This is a great idea and I am hoping it works!!! Well I am taking pictures as I do each new step so I can share how I did it when it is all finished! Stay tuned!! lol
Well today I am trying something I have wanted to try for quite awhile but never knew how to do it and haven't found a recipe so to speak on how to do it. Well I got an email from Canadian Living and there is an article on how to make paper from paper you would normally toss-hopefully in the recycling bin. :) I just can't believe how much paper enters our home each week and it would be nice to be able to use it somehow. This is a great idea and I am hoping it works!!! Well I am taking pictures as I do each new step so I can share how I did it when it is all finished! Stay tuned!! lol
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Changes
Hi again,
I want to talk about something that I have continually struggled to put into words. It is about what I have dealt with physically through the surgeries I have had. Of course not everything because that would take a long time and I can explain most of it perfectly. Long story short-it hurts.lol But this one part of it has been something that has affected me so much. That part is the loss of strength that came with the surgery. Before the initial back surgery, I had alot of issues physically and could not work or really do alot of anything and was in chronic pain but I took pride in the fact that despite all of this, I had worked hard to keep my muscle strength. I was strong and I was complimented on it sometimes also. I loved it. Despite all the physical challenges I had-I could be strong still, well at least in some ways. I could lift heavy objects and I didn't need to ask for help from a strong man so to speak. lol But I never really realized (nor did it occur to me) that I would lose most of it with the surgery. But I did. I went to the hospital and went to sleep for the surgery and 9hrs later I woke up with out the strength to even lift a glass of water or pull myself up in the bed. My back of course was in a ton of pain and when it came time to walk again, it felt as if I had to relearn how. My legs didn't even have the strength I had before. Walking just to the bathroom required a nurse. lol 2 surgeries later and lots of recovery and physio, the thing that I have struggled to explain is how it felt. When I got out of the hospital-I automatically went to open the door and when I got home I would start to do a simple movement that I had done millions of times before and I would not be able to. Pain would quickly shoot through my back and body plus my muscles just didn't have any strength. But in my memory I knew I had done it before and I guess without thinking I thought I could still do it. I had a lot of hard lessons! lol I realized how to explain it this way- I feel like I was put into another body that is not mine and I still have the memories of before with the strength and ability I had but the body I have had this past while is not the same one. The limitations have been so big compared to what I dealt with before. These limitations are not permanent of course and come with the extensive surgery I went through where my muscles in my back were cut through to get to my spine. But to lose so much ability was so hard and to have to depend on other people just to change my clothes or have a shower or pour out a glass of juice when I had that strength before that I loved....it has been hard. I spent alot of time being embarrassed to ask and alot of times trying to do it on my own to avoid the embarrassment of having to admit I couldn't do something which would end in lots of pain. I have come so far and I am doing so many things again that I haven't been able to do till now but I still have stuff that I go to do that I used to do daily and pain shoots through my body reminding me that my body still isn't the same yet as it was. The interesting thing is trying to lift or pull objects that seemed so light to me before but are now seem so heavy and almost impossible to lift- in my mind I don't remember it being so heavy... lol But through all of this I have learned to accept help...well mostly. lol Which is something I have always had issues with. I have also learned so much that I can relate to others in ways I would not be able to had I not gone through this. Also having gone through this, I get this sense of joy when I can open a window now because I remember what it was like to not be able to do such a simple task. I guess it reminds me of the post I made earlier about winter and spring and how it relates to our lives. How winter helps us realize how amazing summer is. In the same way, going through this experience has taught me to not take anything for granted because I have realized what it is like to have something taken away even if only for a short time in my life. Then getting it back has given me this joy that I would not have felt otherwise. I apologize that this is so long and I wish I was more succinct and to the point but sadly I am not. lol I can be a little long winded I think the term is. lol Also I am still struggling to explain how I feel through this. I hope that maybe this may help someone in some way. I have no idea how but who knows right? lol I am just trying to be honest here with the stuff I face in my life and this is one that I face daily and have just recently realized how to put it into words. Thanks again for reading.
I want to talk about something that I have continually struggled to put into words. It is about what I have dealt with physically through the surgeries I have had. Of course not everything because that would take a long time and I can explain most of it perfectly. Long story short-it hurts.lol But this one part of it has been something that has affected me so much. That part is the loss of strength that came with the surgery. Before the initial back surgery, I had alot of issues physically and could not work or really do alot of anything and was in chronic pain but I took pride in the fact that despite all of this, I had worked hard to keep my muscle strength. I was strong and I was complimented on it sometimes also. I loved it. Despite all the physical challenges I had-I could be strong still, well at least in some ways. I could lift heavy objects and I didn't need to ask for help from a strong man so to speak. lol But I never really realized (nor did it occur to me) that I would lose most of it with the surgery. But I did. I went to the hospital and went to sleep for the surgery and 9hrs later I woke up with out the strength to even lift a glass of water or pull myself up in the bed. My back of course was in a ton of pain and when it came time to walk again, it felt as if I had to relearn how. My legs didn't even have the strength I had before. Walking just to the bathroom required a nurse. lol 2 surgeries later and lots of recovery and physio, the thing that I have struggled to explain is how it felt. When I got out of the hospital-I automatically went to open the door and when I got home I would start to do a simple movement that I had done millions of times before and I would not be able to. Pain would quickly shoot through my back and body plus my muscles just didn't have any strength. But in my memory I knew I had done it before and I guess without thinking I thought I could still do it. I had a lot of hard lessons! lol I realized how to explain it this way- I feel like I was put into another body that is not mine and I still have the memories of before with the strength and ability I had but the body I have had this past while is not the same one. The limitations have been so big compared to what I dealt with before. These limitations are not permanent of course and come with the extensive surgery I went through where my muscles in my back were cut through to get to my spine. But to lose so much ability was so hard and to have to depend on other people just to change my clothes or have a shower or pour out a glass of juice when I had that strength before that I loved....it has been hard. I spent alot of time being embarrassed to ask and alot of times trying to do it on my own to avoid the embarrassment of having to admit I couldn't do something which would end in lots of pain. I have come so far and I am doing so many things again that I haven't been able to do till now but I still have stuff that I go to do that I used to do daily and pain shoots through my body reminding me that my body still isn't the same yet as it was. The interesting thing is trying to lift or pull objects that seemed so light to me before but are now seem so heavy and almost impossible to lift- in my mind I don't remember it being so heavy... lol But through all of this I have learned to accept help...well mostly. lol Which is something I have always had issues with. I have also learned so much that I can relate to others in ways I would not be able to had I not gone through this. Also having gone through this, I get this sense of joy when I can open a window now because I remember what it was like to not be able to do such a simple task. I guess it reminds me of the post I made earlier about winter and spring and how it relates to our lives. How winter helps us realize how amazing summer is. In the same way, going through this experience has taught me to not take anything for granted because I have realized what it is like to have something taken away even if only for a short time in my life. Then getting it back has given me this joy that I would not have felt otherwise. I apologize that this is so long and I wish I was more succinct and to the point but sadly I am not. lol I can be a little long winded I think the term is. lol Also I am still struggling to explain how I feel through this. I hope that maybe this may help someone in some way. I have no idea how but who knows right? lol I am just trying to be honest here with the stuff I face in my life and this is one that I face daily and have just recently realized how to put it into words. Thanks again for reading.
Pets
Hi again,
I had a very scary experience last night with my kitty Felix. The pic of him is on the left hand side at the top. Well every night I feed him a couple scoops of wet food as a treat and like clockwork if he hasn't gotten it yet he will start meowing at me at about 11:15pm. Last night he was rather quiet from about 9pm or so onward but I thought maybe he was just sleeping. I was preoccupied with sorting papers in my room and also chatting on smartcanucks which I spend alot of free time on. lol Anyways at about 11:15pm I started to wonder where he was so I started saying my goodnights to people on there and finally left and then went to go check on him because I was a little concerned. I could not find him anywhere and I was panicking so bad and I was so worried that he had maybe climbed on something and something fell on him or he got stuck somewhere and that he was hurt. With every moment that I could not find him I felt more and more panicked and actually found it tough to breath. I was so scared. Then I went into the family room and heard a very faint meow and I could tell he was alive but I had no idea where he was. Every time I went off in another direction to see if I could get closer, his meows got fainter that I could not hear them. So I got my sister to get my parents to help me look which was good because my dad had a good idea of what had happened. Earlier that night my parents had opened a window in the family room to get an arch inside that my dad made for the family room and apparently the window was the best way to do it. Well Felix must have slipped out before it got closed. It turns out that Felix was under that same window meowing to come back inside. I guess he figured it was the way he got out so it must be the way back in. Smart cat! I felt so terrible for not noticing he was so quiet and not going looking sooner. He was outside by himself in the dark and mud and chilly air for a couple of hours without food or water. I still feel awful for him. I don't know what I would have done if something would have happened to him. He is my life pretty much. He has been with me through so much, through my surgeries and my recovery and is so sweet and will lay on my stomach and cuddle when I can't get out and about. He really is part of the family and even my dad has a real soft spot for him even though my dad sort of denies it. lol Pets are amazing and great company and they don't talk back and they love you even though you are not perfect and they are always honest. Each one has it's own personality and little quirks and can't ever be replaced. Kind of describes family doesn't it? Well I am keeping a really careful eye on him today and he will get a bath later too. lol But no worries because he loves baths! odd I know. He sure is one of a kind!
I had a very scary experience last night with my kitty Felix. The pic of him is on the left hand side at the top. Well every night I feed him a couple scoops of wet food as a treat and like clockwork if he hasn't gotten it yet he will start meowing at me at about 11:15pm. Last night he was rather quiet from about 9pm or so onward but I thought maybe he was just sleeping. I was preoccupied with sorting papers in my room and also chatting on smartcanucks which I spend alot of free time on. lol Anyways at about 11:15pm I started to wonder where he was so I started saying my goodnights to people on there and finally left and then went to go check on him because I was a little concerned. I could not find him anywhere and I was panicking so bad and I was so worried that he had maybe climbed on something and something fell on him or he got stuck somewhere and that he was hurt. With every moment that I could not find him I felt more and more panicked and actually found it tough to breath. I was so scared. Then I went into the family room and heard a very faint meow and I could tell he was alive but I had no idea where he was. Every time I went off in another direction to see if I could get closer, his meows got fainter that I could not hear them. So I got my sister to get my parents to help me look which was good because my dad had a good idea of what had happened. Earlier that night my parents had opened a window in the family room to get an arch inside that my dad made for the family room and apparently the window was the best way to do it. Well Felix must have slipped out before it got closed. It turns out that Felix was under that same window meowing to come back inside. I guess he figured it was the way he got out so it must be the way back in. Smart cat! I felt so terrible for not noticing he was so quiet and not going looking sooner. He was outside by himself in the dark and mud and chilly air for a couple of hours without food or water. I still feel awful for him. I don't know what I would have done if something would have happened to him. He is my life pretty much. He has been with me through so much, through my surgeries and my recovery and is so sweet and will lay on my stomach and cuddle when I can't get out and about. He really is part of the family and even my dad has a real soft spot for him even though my dad sort of denies it. lol Pets are amazing and great company and they don't talk back and they love you even though you are not perfect and they are always honest. Each one has it's own personality and little quirks and can't ever be replaced. Kind of describes family doesn't it? Well I am keeping a really careful eye on him today and he will get a bath later too. lol But no worries because he loves baths! odd I know. He sure is one of a kind!
Church
Hi again,
Ok so this is something I have wanted to touch on but it could be very sensitive and I don't want to offend anyone but I want to talk about it. So here it goes.
Well I currently do not belong to a church. I have been to several churches in my life but only technically a member of two. There is something though that frustrates me about churches and that is what I want to talk about. There has always been a debate (well around here anyways) about whether you have to go to church or not if you are a Christian. When I was younger I was told that you have to go to be a good Christian but I didn't really agree with it but wasn't sure. One time at a church I was visiting because we were searching for a new church, the youth group I was part of did a debate over the whole church or no church thing which really got me thinkign seriously about it for the first time. Good points were made for both sides. Anyways my problem with churches is so often it almost feels as if church is self serving in the sense that we go to help our own self but also to serve God. There is need for that-I don't disagree with that but so often the self serving part seems to be the primary reason and then we let it stop at us. I think church should also be used to help us to help others. I don't know if I am making sense here but I am trying to convey what I am feeling. I love helping others and I am not saying this to look good at all-I just do. I feel it is our purpose here and it feels good to know I have made an impact and helped make the world a better place and that I didn't just take up space on this planet. I feel that it is also our purpose as Christians. But the churches I have gone to-I look around and it is like pulling teeth to get people to do something. So many people go to church on Sunday and sing the songs and like the sermons but it sort of seems to stop at that. There are so many opportunities to help others but people in the church often don't help. They are too busy or what ever. There are some that do of course but they end up burning out because they are doing so much because there isn't enough help. I don't know if this is a problem in more communities than mine but it is a problem here. There is always a lack of help even within the church. I also see the need in the communities and the churches do some but if all the churches pitched in and each took part-I can only imagine how amazing it would be. One time there was a Habitat For Humanity house being started and I was so excited and so pumped up and I thought hey this would be such a great opportunity for a group of us from the church to help out. So I went to the one pastor and was so excited and shared my thoughts on getting a group together and helping out in the community. But it didn't happen sadly. I went to people myself but could not get anyone interested. I tried to help still though. Another year the VBS program didn't run because there was not enough people to help. A program that reached out to the community sort of stopped running because there wasn't enough people interested in helping out. It is so sad to see. It bothers me so much also. My parents and siblings are the same as me and we love to do what we can and we finally got so frustrated trying to get people to do something that we finally left. My mom and my sister and I were heading something called White Cross where we would sew baby clothes and make bandages from old sheets for the hospitals in Africa and we were so passionate about it and so were about 3 other people but we could not get any more help from the whole church. We even offered food at the get togethers! lol But no one else was interested. We were so grateful for the help we had though. Anyways is it so important to go to church? Or can we serve God in other ways. Are we not serving God when we help others? Another point I would like to make is that I find I can have a more honest time with God by myself where I am not around other people who distract me. I also have a hard time being open when around other people. I worry what people will think of me if they don't agree with the way I do stuff. Maybe it stems from growing up in a church where everything was for show for other people to see and I hated that. I once saw something from Bono where he shared what he thought of Christians and he echoed what I felt about Christians not doing as much as we should be doing. I guess not even so much what we should be doing-there should be a desire to help others shouldn't there be? Is there a desire but people don't know what to do? Do people get too busy by accident? There are alot of good people in the church-I am not saying there isn't but why don't people want to do more for others?
I would like to add that I am not really against church because it can be good but I just get so frustrated with some things. I just wish there would be a church I could attend where more people wanted to do more for others and it wasn't just talk and there was more action. People are so good at talking about stuff but it gets tiring because no one actually does anything. I am tired of getting hopeful that there are other people other than me who are going to do stuff and then it is just talk. I get tired of sermons that are clearly about helping others and it is important but even the pastor is just talk. Show me a church where people actually DO help others and want to and are passionate about it and I would be love to be a part of it.
Ok so this is something I have wanted to touch on but it could be very sensitive and I don't want to offend anyone but I want to talk about it. So here it goes.
Well I currently do not belong to a church. I have been to several churches in my life but only technically a member of two. There is something though that frustrates me about churches and that is what I want to talk about. There has always been a debate (well around here anyways) about whether you have to go to church or not if you are a Christian. When I was younger I was told that you have to go to be a good Christian but I didn't really agree with it but wasn't sure. One time at a church I was visiting because we were searching for a new church, the youth group I was part of did a debate over the whole church or no church thing which really got me thinkign seriously about it for the first time. Good points were made for both sides. Anyways my problem with churches is so often it almost feels as if church is self serving in the sense that we go to help our own self but also to serve God. There is need for that-I don't disagree with that but so often the self serving part seems to be the primary reason and then we let it stop at us. I think church should also be used to help us to help others. I don't know if I am making sense here but I am trying to convey what I am feeling. I love helping others and I am not saying this to look good at all-I just do. I feel it is our purpose here and it feels good to know I have made an impact and helped make the world a better place and that I didn't just take up space on this planet. I feel that it is also our purpose as Christians. But the churches I have gone to-I look around and it is like pulling teeth to get people to do something. So many people go to church on Sunday and sing the songs and like the sermons but it sort of seems to stop at that. There are so many opportunities to help others but people in the church often don't help. They are too busy or what ever. There are some that do of course but they end up burning out because they are doing so much because there isn't enough help. I don't know if this is a problem in more communities than mine but it is a problem here. There is always a lack of help even within the church. I also see the need in the communities and the churches do some but if all the churches pitched in and each took part-I can only imagine how amazing it would be. One time there was a Habitat For Humanity house being started and I was so excited and so pumped up and I thought hey this would be such a great opportunity for a group of us from the church to help out. So I went to the one pastor and was so excited and shared my thoughts on getting a group together and helping out in the community. But it didn't happen sadly. I went to people myself but could not get anyone interested. I tried to help still though. Another year the VBS program didn't run because there was not enough people to help. A program that reached out to the community sort of stopped running because there wasn't enough people interested in helping out. It is so sad to see. It bothers me so much also. My parents and siblings are the same as me and we love to do what we can and we finally got so frustrated trying to get people to do something that we finally left. My mom and my sister and I were heading something called White Cross where we would sew baby clothes and make bandages from old sheets for the hospitals in Africa and we were so passionate about it and so were about 3 other people but we could not get any more help from the whole church. We even offered food at the get togethers! lol But no one else was interested. We were so grateful for the help we had though. Anyways is it so important to go to church? Or can we serve God in other ways. Are we not serving God when we help others? Another point I would like to make is that I find I can have a more honest time with God by myself where I am not around other people who distract me. I also have a hard time being open when around other people. I worry what people will think of me if they don't agree with the way I do stuff. Maybe it stems from growing up in a church where everything was for show for other people to see and I hated that. I once saw something from Bono where he shared what he thought of Christians and he echoed what I felt about Christians not doing as much as we should be doing. I guess not even so much what we should be doing-there should be a desire to help others shouldn't there be? Is there a desire but people don't know what to do? Do people get too busy by accident? There are alot of good people in the church-I am not saying there isn't but why don't people want to do more for others?
I would like to add that I am not really against church because it can be good but I just get so frustrated with some things. I just wish there would be a church I could attend where more people wanted to do more for others and it wasn't just talk and there was more action. People are so good at talking about stuff but it gets tiring because no one actually does anything. I am tired of getting hopeful that there are other people other than me who are going to do stuff and then it is just talk. I get tired of sermons that are clearly about helping others and it is important but even the pastor is just talk. Show me a church where people actually DO help others and want to and are passionate about it and I would be love to be a part of it.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
MUD!!!!! Is SPRING finally here??!!!
Hi again,
Well over the past few days MUD has appeared!!! Wow I may run the risk of sounding odd here but it is always sooo neat to see mud for the first time each spring!!! Ok so spring hasn't officially arrived yet and we are still supposed to get more snow next week but hey there is mud and I am extatic!! lol Not muddy slush or frozen mud but squish between your boots get stuck in the mud type mud! I suppose it could be squish between your toes type mud too but at this time of year it may still be too cold to go bare foot. lol So anyways seeing this mud is so exciting because first of all I haven't seen mud since like last October (about 6months?) and second it signifies that it is getting warmer and spring is just around the corner.... hopefully. lol You never ever know with March what could come-it could still turn to -20 by the end of March but I am hoping that likelyhood is well unlikely. lol I should also mention I really am just a big kid and yep I still jump in mud puddles. lol It is so much fun still. Is that odd? I still love to put on my rubber boots and play in the mud so to speak. Who says this should only be for kids? lol This time of year is always so much fun and really gives this hope that everything that has been dormant and dead looking will soon spring to life again and the cold winter is going to be a memory soon.... well until the next year. lol I love spring and the new life that comes with it and the excitement of watching buds on the trees open and plants sprout from the ground. Seeing the first sign of new life like the first leaf or the first tulips push up through the ground gives me so much joy and excitement. I think that is part of why I live here in a climate where everything actually goes dorment and it gets cold because when everything comes back again it gives that much more joy than if it had never left. I don't know if I could live in a climate where nothing dies away over the winter that I would miss the firsts that happen every spring here. I think I would miss knowing the joy that comes with spring. I can admit easily that I don't like winter so much when it gets really cold but that makes spring all the more exciting. I guess it mirrors our lives in a way too. What I mean is if we didn't have struggles or pain in our lives, which no one wants or likes, we would not have the same joy that we experience when our lives go well. I think there would be nothing to compare the good against and it would not be near as exciting. Sorry it is something I realized awhile back and helps me get through the rough patches because I know that a better time is coming and that it will be all the more enjoyable because I know what it is like to not have it and to not take it for granted. If you have something all the time, you don't realize what it would be like to not have it and you are more likely to take it for granted right? I have alot more I could add to this but I think I will leave it at this. Thanks again for reading my blog!
Well over the past few days MUD has appeared!!! Wow I may run the risk of sounding odd here but it is always sooo neat to see mud for the first time each spring!!! Ok so spring hasn't officially arrived yet and we are still supposed to get more snow next week but hey there is mud and I am extatic!! lol Not muddy slush or frozen mud but squish between your boots get stuck in the mud type mud! I suppose it could be squish between your toes type mud too but at this time of year it may still be too cold to go bare foot. lol So anyways seeing this mud is so exciting because first of all I haven't seen mud since like last October (about 6months?) and second it signifies that it is getting warmer and spring is just around the corner.... hopefully. lol You never ever know with March what could come-it could still turn to -20 by the end of March but I am hoping that likelyhood is well unlikely. lol I should also mention I really am just a big kid and yep I still jump in mud puddles. lol It is so much fun still. Is that odd? I still love to put on my rubber boots and play in the mud so to speak. Who says this should only be for kids? lol This time of year is always so much fun and really gives this hope that everything that has been dormant and dead looking will soon spring to life again and the cold winter is going to be a memory soon.... well until the next year. lol I love spring and the new life that comes with it and the excitement of watching buds on the trees open and plants sprout from the ground. Seeing the first sign of new life like the first leaf or the first tulips push up through the ground gives me so much joy and excitement. I think that is part of why I live here in a climate where everything actually goes dorment and it gets cold because when everything comes back again it gives that much more joy than if it had never left. I don't know if I could live in a climate where nothing dies away over the winter that I would miss the firsts that happen every spring here. I think I would miss knowing the joy that comes with spring. I can admit easily that I don't like winter so much when it gets really cold but that makes spring all the more exciting. I guess it mirrors our lives in a way too. What I mean is if we didn't have struggles or pain in our lives, which no one wants or likes, we would not have the same joy that we experience when our lives go well. I think there would be nothing to compare the good against and it would not be near as exciting. Sorry it is something I realized awhile back and helps me get through the rough patches because I know that a better time is coming and that it will be all the more enjoyable because I know what it is like to not have it and to not take it for granted. If you have something all the time, you don't realize what it would be like to not have it and you are more likely to take it for granted right? I have alot more I could add to this but I think I will leave it at this. Thanks again for reading my blog!
Friday, March 5, 2010
Validation
Yesterday I realized something big. I look for validation in all the wrong places. I also realized I don't know exactly where the right places to look for validation are but I have an idea I think. I realized I look to other people for approval and validation essentially. I seek people's approval but sometimes the people I go to for approval don't always approve of me which reinforces my feelings of not being good enough. Do I choose these people to reinforce what I think of myself or is it by chance? But I thrive on people's compliments and I seek out approval also. I think that if people think I am good and I am important then I must be. But I think I should be looking at myself and giving myself validation right? I should be able to say to myself that I am doing good and it should be enough right? But it isn't. The interesting thing though also is that when people say I am good-I have a hard time believing it. I don't trust them but I still seek it out. I still feel this need to hear it. I would like to say it stems from the teacher who did stuff to me and her constantly telling me I was worthless and would never amount to anything etc but that is giving her too much power I think. If you have the feeling from this post and others that I am confused-you are right. lol I am confused...alot! lol But I am trying to figure stuff out. Why I do what I do. Why I need people to tell me I am good when I don't even believe it anyways. I guess part of me thinks that if enough people tell me I am good enough then I will believe it finally. But you know what? I am realizing I will never believe it no matter how many people compliment me. I can't find validation through other people. I need to find it with in myself somehow I think. This will be interesting because I have no idea how to accomplish this but I am going to try. Thanks for reading!
Thursday, March 4, 2010
PICTURES!!!
Ok well I love taking pictures and these pictures are from last week of the frost but I was so immersed in the Olympics I didn't even find time to look at them till this week! lol Well I hope you enjoy seeing these as much as I did taking them!
This is of our willows covered in frost
This is a picture I managed to capture showing the frost falling off the willows which is so much fun to stand under as it falls! It is so pretty too!
This is of the Silver Maples outside my bedroom window and the beautiful blue Alberta sky!
This is one of the frost falling off of the trees and I tried to capture how the frost sparkles as it falls but I suppose it is one of those things you really have to be there to see it completely. I love standing there and watching the frost fall around me and how it sparkles in the sunlight. Soooo pretty!
Frost on a Silver Maple and gorgous Blue Alberta sky.
This is of our willows covered in frost
This is a picture I managed to capture showing the frost falling off the willows which is so much fun to stand under as it falls! It is so pretty too!
This is of the Silver Maples outside my bedroom window and the beautiful blue Alberta sky!
This is one of the frost falling off of the trees and I tried to capture how the frost sparkles as it falls but I suppose it is one of those things you really have to be there to see it completely. I love standing there and watching the frost fall around me and how it sparkles in the sunlight. Soooo pretty!
Frost on a Silver Maple and gorgous Blue Alberta sky.
Skating- no go!
Hi Again,
Well I went to go skating and wasn't able to because it has been so nice outside that the ice on Bower Ponds is turning in to slush. So I could not skate sadly. I was really dissapointed. I ended up buying a McCain Deep N Delicious Cake because chocolate cake always makes a person feel better! lol well it tasted sooo good but I think I need more than that to get back to my old self again. So I am working on it. I did go for a nice walk though-it is so beautiful outside!! March is a month that every year it can be different. It is sort of where the weather starts to change so we can sometimes have -30 and snowing or no snow and +10! lol It is very unpredictable. My birthday is at the end of March and I have seen +20 and also -40 and blizzarding and anything and everything in between. Of course not in the same year but different years. lol Well this year looks like we could have a nice March but it can also change in a hurry too. It will be interesting to see how March shapes up in terms of weather. So far it isn't looking very good for skating outside! lol
Well I went to go skating and wasn't able to because it has been so nice outside that the ice on Bower Ponds is turning in to slush. So I could not skate sadly. I was really dissapointed. I ended up buying a McCain Deep N Delicious Cake because chocolate cake always makes a person feel better! lol well it tasted sooo good but I think I need more than that to get back to my old self again. So I am working on it. I did go for a nice walk though-it is so beautiful outside!! March is a month that every year it can be different. It is sort of where the weather starts to change so we can sometimes have -30 and snowing or no snow and +10! lol It is very unpredictable. My birthday is at the end of March and I have seen +20 and also -40 and blizzarding and anything and everything in between. Of course not in the same year but different years. lol Well this year looks like we could have a nice March but it can also change in a hurry too. It will be interesting to see how March shapes up in terms of weather. So far it isn't looking very good for skating outside! lol
Ketchup
Hi again,
The title may seem odd and it is actually only something that signifies a bigger issue. If you have been following my blog, you probably read my post about curveballs. Well lately I have been dealing with a lot of wee little curveballs that have been making day to day stuff difficult. Emotionally I have actually been not doing so well as a result. You know how it is probably-things happen and you get worn down emotionally? Well that is where I am at. I will not get into everything but today I sort of had the thing that just is so insignificant but because of everything else-it brought me almost to tears. That thing? We ran out of ketchup and there is none in the pantry because someone forgot to write it on the grocery list. We have a rule here that if you grab the last one of something-you write it on the grocery list. Well it doesn't always work obviously. Well normally this would be something so insignificant to me and I would just search for something that would work second best and be on with my life. But not today. I was almost in tears. It is funny how when we are dealing with stuff that we react so differently to things. One other issue I had that is bothering me is that I did something last week that required me to open up and share and trust and I got my hopes up and I have realized today that it probably won't happen. I think I set myself up in a way though because the likelyhood of it happening was very slim. So I have realized I need to do something because I can't stay in this place where no ketchup is so upsetting to me. lol So I am going to go skating this afternoon and hopefully manage to enjoy myself and feel better emotionally. I might even take another pic to post. lol Thanks for reading.
The title may seem odd and it is actually only something that signifies a bigger issue. If you have been following my blog, you probably read my post about curveballs. Well lately I have been dealing with a lot of wee little curveballs that have been making day to day stuff difficult. Emotionally I have actually been not doing so well as a result. You know how it is probably-things happen and you get worn down emotionally? Well that is where I am at. I will not get into everything but today I sort of had the thing that just is so insignificant but because of everything else-it brought me almost to tears. That thing? We ran out of ketchup and there is none in the pantry because someone forgot to write it on the grocery list. We have a rule here that if you grab the last one of something-you write it on the grocery list. Well it doesn't always work obviously. Well normally this would be something so insignificant to me and I would just search for something that would work second best and be on with my life. But not today. I was almost in tears. It is funny how when we are dealing with stuff that we react so differently to things. One other issue I had that is bothering me is that I did something last week that required me to open up and share and trust and I got my hopes up and I have realized today that it probably won't happen. I think I set myself up in a way though because the likelyhood of it happening was very slim. So I have realized I need to do something because I can't stay in this place where no ketchup is so upsetting to me. lol So I am going to go skating this afternoon and hopefully manage to enjoy myself and feel better emotionally. I might even take another pic to post. lol Thanks for reading.
My thoughts on The Secret
Hi again,
Well yesterday I watched Oprah-yes I watch Oprah sometimes if it sounds interesting. Anyways it was about beauty and what it looks like around the world and what not and was quite interesting actually. BUT of course Oprah had to bring up stuff about the Secret which she is in to and I was like oh boy here it comes again. Let me say right off I am against alot of what is in The Secret. Also it is frustrating that because Oprah endorses it then people seem to follow blindly without really thinking about it and what they are agreeing with. The whole premise of the Secret I think is on how the Universe is in control and it gives you back what you give out. But my major problem with this is that essentially bad stuff that happens to you is completely your fault and in some cases it actually is but in the instance of rape or murder-how can you tell people they were raped because of something they sent out in to the universe that caused the universe to cause this to happen? Let me say right now that people who are raped did not do this to themselves and it is NOT their fault. I believe in God and free will of every person and there is evil in this world also as well as good. Not some universe that gives you what you ask for. I do think that a small bit of the Secret is right in the sense that we attract people who are like us in the sense that if we are positive that positive people will likely enjoy beign around us but that is ALL that is correct with the Secret. Beyond that it is bogus. Yesterday Oprah said to Jessica Simpson that because she feels she has learned what Beauty really is that the universe is going to test her to see if she has really learned this lesson because the universe is always teaching us lessons and testing us. LOL ROFL Uh this had me laughing pretty hard! Well I think I can explain this in more normal terms here. Well Jessica appears on Oprah and essentially is putting a spotlight on herself where people see her and will either critisize or applaud her. The universe Oprah is actually speaking about is of the people variety. Not some cosmic force that causes people to do things to test Jessica Simpson. I personally think Jessica looks healthy and beautiful and I don't get why anyone would want to say she is fat but I guess some people like annorexic girls that are sticks I suppose? How is that beautiful? I am sorry-I try to be nice and polite about things I post but this is so extremely frustrating for me that people would believe this. I try to not let things get under my skin but it doesn't always work and this is something that I really have a hard time with and it has really gotten under my skin. Thanks for reading and I hope I have not offended anyone.
Well yesterday I watched Oprah-yes I watch Oprah sometimes if it sounds interesting. Anyways it was about beauty and what it looks like around the world and what not and was quite interesting actually. BUT of course Oprah had to bring up stuff about the Secret which she is in to and I was like oh boy here it comes again. Let me say right off I am against alot of what is in The Secret. Also it is frustrating that because Oprah endorses it then people seem to follow blindly without really thinking about it and what they are agreeing with. The whole premise of the Secret I think is on how the Universe is in control and it gives you back what you give out. But my major problem with this is that essentially bad stuff that happens to you is completely your fault and in some cases it actually is but in the instance of rape or murder-how can you tell people they were raped because of something they sent out in to the universe that caused the universe to cause this to happen? Let me say right now that people who are raped did not do this to themselves and it is NOT their fault. I believe in God and free will of every person and there is evil in this world also as well as good. Not some universe that gives you what you ask for. I do think that a small bit of the Secret is right in the sense that we attract people who are like us in the sense that if we are positive that positive people will likely enjoy beign around us but that is ALL that is correct with the Secret. Beyond that it is bogus. Yesterday Oprah said to Jessica Simpson that because she feels she has learned what Beauty really is that the universe is going to test her to see if she has really learned this lesson because the universe is always teaching us lessons and testing us. LOL ROFL Uh this had me laughing pretty hard! Well I think I can explain this in more normal terms here. Well Jessica appears on Oprah and essentially is putting a spotlight on herself where people see her and will either critisize or applaud her. The universe Oprah is actually speaking about is of the people variety. Not some cosmic force that causes people to do things to test Jessica Simpson. I personally think Jessica looks healthy and beautiful and I don't get why anyone would want to say she is fat but I guess some people like annorexic girls that are sticks I suppose? How is that beautiful? I am sorry-I try to be nice and polite about things I post but this is so extremely frustrating for me that people would believe this. I try to not let things get under my skin but it doesn't always work and this is something that I really have a hard time with and it has really gotten under my skin. Thanks for reading and I hope I have not offended anyone.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
What a nice gesture
Hi again,
Quite often I get annoyed with the comments and opinions of Americans about Canada and how often we are mocked or put down or just plain not understood. I am sure it has showed up in some of my posts. But I just saw something that someone posted on another website that showed me that not all Americans think so badly of us and took time to show the similarities between two countries that share a very long border. Here is the video that is quite touching and shows that shows Canada's qualities that we have known about all along and wished that Americans would see I think. Here is the link. Tom Brokaw Explains Canada To Americans.
Also an NBC anchor left quite a nice thank you note apparently for us Canadians after the Olympics were done that is also quite touching and funny. Here it is.
"Leaving behind a thank-you note
This is from the NBC Olympic anchorman:
Brian Williams, anchor and managing editor
After tonight's broadcast and after looting our hotel mini-bars, we're going to try to brave the blizzard and fly east to home and hearth, and to do laundry well into next week. Before we leave this thoroughly polite country, the polite thing to do is leave behind a thank-you note.
Thank you, Canada:
For being such good hosts.
For your unfailing courtesy.
For your (mostly) beautiful weather.
For scheduling no more than 60 percent of your float plane departures at the exact moment when I was trying to say something on television.
For not seeming to mind the occasional (or constant) good-natured mimicry of your accents.
For your unique TV commercials -- for companies like Tim Hortons -- which made us laugh and cry.
For securing this massive event without choking security, and without publicly displaying a single automatic weapon.
For having the best garment design and logo-wear of the games -- you've made wearing your name a cool thing to do.
For the sportsmanship we saw most of your athletes display.
For not honking your horns. I didn't hear one car horn in 15 days -- which also means none of my fellow New Yorkers rented cars while visiting.
For making us aware of how many of you have been watching NBC all these years.
For having the good taste to have an anchorman named Brian Williams on your CTV network, who turns out to be such a nice guy.
For the body scans at the airport which make pat-downs and cavity searches unnecessary.
For designing those really cool LED Olympic rings in the harbor, which turned to gold when your athletes won one.
For always saying nice things about the United States...when you know we're listening.
For sharing Joannie Rochette with us.
For reminding some of us we used to be a more civil society.
Mostly, for welcoming the world with such ease and making lasting friends with all of us."
I guess there are Americans who do not think badly of Canada after all! Maybe after these Olympics maybe, just maybe, there will be a few less Americans who put us Canadians down and realize we are a great country also. Maybe Americans thinking we are a great country is a little much to ask tho-even if they feel we are ok and they stop putting us down that would be a fine start in my books! lol Thanks for reading!
Quite often I get annoyed with the comments and opinions of Americans about Canada and how often we are mocked or put down or just plain not understood. I am sure it has showed up in some of my posts. But I just saw something that someone posted on another website that showed me that not all Americans think so badly of us and took time to show the similarities between two countries that share a very long border. Here is the video that is quite touching and shows that shows Canada's qualities that we have known about all along and wished that Americans would see I think. Here is the link. Tom Brokaw Explains Canada To Americans.
Also an NBC anchor left quite a nice thank you note apparently for us Canadians after the Olympics were done that is also quite touching and funny. Here it is.
"Leaving behind a thank-you note
This is from the NBC Olympic anchorman:
Brian Williams, anchor and managing editor
After tonight's broadcast and after looting our hotel mini-bars, we're going to try to brave the blizzard and fly east to home and hearth, and to do laundry well into next week. Before we leave this thoroughly polite country, the polite thing to do is leave behind a thank-you note.
Thank you, Canada:
For being such good hosts.
For your unfailing courtesy.
For your (mostly) beautiful weather.
For scheduling no more than 60 percent of your float plane departures at the exact moment when I was trying to say something on television.
For not seeming to mind the occasional (or constant) good-natured mimicry of your accents.
For your unique TV commercials -- for companies like Tim Hortons -- which made us laugh and cry.
For securing this massive event without choking security, and without publicly displaying a single automatic weapon.
For having the best garment design and logo-wear of the games -- you've made wearing your name a cool thing to do.
For the sportsmanship we saw most of your athletes display.
For not honking your horns. I didn't hear one car horn in 15 days -- which also means none of my fellow New Yorkers rented cars while visiting.
For making us aware of how many of you have been watching NBC all these years.
For having the good taste to have an anchorman named Brian Williams on your CTV network, who turns out to be such a nice guy.
For the body scans at the airport which make pat-downs and cavity searches unnecessary.
For designing those really cool LED Olympic rings in the harbor, which turned to gold when your athletes won one.
For always saying nice things about the United States...when you know we're listening.
For sharing Joannie Rochette with us.
For reminding some of us we used to be a more civil society.
Mostly, for welcoming the world with such ease and making lasting friends with all of us."
I guess there are Americans who do not think badly of Canada after all! Maybe after these Olympics maybe, just maybe, there will be a few less Americans who put us Canadians down and realize we are a great country also. Maybe Americans thinking we are a great country is a little much to ask tho-even if they feel we are ok and they stop putting us down that would be a fine start in my books! lol Thanks for reading!
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
new diet for a few days
Hi again,
I just had a tooth pulled yesterday that had to be done sadly. I did not have much other choice because I don't have money to afford a root canal. Anyways I can't have solid food for a few days so that had left me sad and a bit cranky because to me food is almost a hobby because I love food soooo much! lol You would not guess it from looking at me but I have been blessed with a great metabolism I guess? Or something else possibly? I have to eat alot because I am always hungry so I guess I burn through calories quickly. Anyways I was sad because I can't eat the usual food for a few days and I am rather hungry because of the restricted diet. So someone I know sent me this link to a very funny youtube video that helped cheer me up! I wanted to share it with you! Computer Says Noo it is so soooo funny! Now back to mashed potatoes and strawberry yogurt. lol But not at the same time-I don't know if that combo would taste so good together. lol I will try make myself some baby food later too. Yay! so much fun. lol
I just had a tooth pulled yesterday that had to be done sadly. I did not have much other choice because I don't have money to afford a root canal. Anyways I can't have solid food for a few days so that had left me sad and a bit cranky because to me food is almost a hobby because I love food soooo much! lol You would not guess it from looking at me but I have been blessed with a great metabolism I guess? Or something else possibly? I have to eat alot because I am always hungry so I guess I burn through calories quickly. Anyways I was sad because I can't eat the usual food for a few days and I am rather hungry because of the restricted diet. So someone I know sent me this link to a very funny youtube video that helped cheer me up! I wanted to share it with you! Computer Says Noo it is so soooo funny! Now back to mashed potatoes and strawberry yogurt. lol But not at the same time-I don't know if that combo would taste so good together. lol I will try make myself some baby food later too. Yay! so much fun. lol
Monday, March 1, 2010
What a great end to the Olympics!!!
Hi again!
Well I really wanted to post about the AMAZING Men's Hockey Game yesterday!! Wow it was another nail biter (if you bite your nails lol) and stressful but Canada pulled through in the end!!!! YAY!! I have to say also that the US really played well and gave Canada a good challenge but what can I say? Hockey is Canada's game and we were just a little bit better! lol The US really did play well and I hope that they enjoy their silver as they should because a silver is still a great accomplishment. But the game was so much fun to watch! Except the last 30seconds when the US scored and tied the game and forced us into overtime! But our guys came back and played great and they were focused and Crosby scored that winning goal which will probably be played over and over now for who knows how long. lol But we can't forget that it was the whole team that got to that point also. It wouldn't have been the golden goal if it hadn't of been for the good game played and the other two goals scored. Also our goalie Roberto was great!! He stopped so many shots and really played well. But that final goal was sooooo exciting and I think all across Canada there was cheering and jumping up and down and celebrating at that same exact moment! Just as we all probably yelled nooooo at the tv when the Americans scored the goal with 24sec left on the clock. But a game is never over till it is over! Well I am really proud of our Men's team and how they came back after the loss against the US and played their best. This was such a great way to end the Olympics on home soil!!!
Also the Closing ceremonies did not dissapoint. They were really quite neat and lots of talent as well! I hope that after all of this, the rest of the world has a better idea of Canada and maybe we will stop hearing questions about us living in igloos and riding polar bears! lol But I have a feeling that will always be around because there will always be people who have some crazy ideas. Also I think we surprised the world that we are as patriotic as we are and I am proud that the world could see how proud we are of our country! Now sadly it is time to get back to our lives and back to normal. But we can do so with a renewed sense of pride in this glorious country called Canada!!!
Well I really wanted to post about the AMAZING Men's Hockey Game yesterday!! Wow it was another nail biter (if you bite your nails lol) and stressful but Canada pulled through in the end!!!! YAY!! I have to say also that the US really played well and gave Canada a good challenge but what can I say? Hockey is Canada's game and we were just a little bit better! lol The US really did play well and I hope that they enjoy their silver as they should because a silver is still a great accomplishment. But the game was so much fun to watch! Except the last 30seconds when the US scored and tied the game and forced us into overtime! But our guys came back and played great and they were focused and Crosby scored that winning goal which will probably be played over and over now for who knows how long. lol But we can't forget that it was the whole team that got to that point also. It wouldn't have been the golden goal if it hadn't of been for the good game played and the other two goals scored. Also our goalie Roberto was great!! He stopped so many shots and really played well. But that final goal was sooooo exciting and I think all across Canada there was cheering and jumping up and down and celebrating at that same exact moment! Just as we all probably yelled nooooo at the tv when the Americans scored the goal with 24sec left on the clock. But a game is never over till it is over! Well I am really proud of our Men's team and how they came back after the loss against the US and played their best. This was such a great way to end the Olympics on home soil!!!
Also the Closing ceremonies did not dissapoint. They were really quite neat and lots of talent as well! I hope that after all of this, the rest of the world has a better idea of Canada and maybe we will stop hearing questions about us living in igloos and riding polar bears! lol But I have a feeling that will always be around because there will always be people who have some crazy ideas. Also I think we surprised the world that we are as patriotic as we are and I am proud that the world could see how proud we are of our country! Now sadly it is time to get back to our lives and back to normal. But we can do so with a renewed sense of pride in this glorious country called Canada!!!
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Curveballs of Life
Hi again,
Well I am looking at the title of this post and actually find my lame attempt of a title kind of funny! lol I want to talk about the curveballs that affect either the entire course of our life or maybe just the next few days. Curveballs that change our plans and our future. Things that happen that we are less than thrilled to see happen. I think we have all had these things happen several times in our lives and in a way it is just a part of life but it can be frustrating. I guess I am thinking about this because I have just been sent another wee little curveball that affects the next few days. Yesterday I started getting pain in my right shoulder and at first I figured it was a spasm of some kind. But it is sharp and doesn't really go away which is different from the usual spasms I get in my back. Then last night I had my leg fall asleep and it just would not wake up. At first I didn't even think there could possibly be a link between the two but there may be. Overnight my leg woke up and now I am left with quite alot of pain and now wishing I wasn't so gung ho on my leg waking up. lol But based on the stuff going on-it seems more nerve related than spasm related. I am seeing my specialist again on March 16 so that is perfect timing in some ways. So between my back and my leg I will probably be stuck in bed again a fair bit of the next few days. haha just when I was planning to try finish off my room and possibly try skating again. The timing is not great but what can I do? My room will have to wait and it will be there to finish when I can get back to it. The skating-well hopefully Bower Ponds has not thawed out before I can get another chance to try skating again. lol One great positive out of all this-I have more time to read! I love to read and currently I am reading a book that is incredibly fascinating and will have to share in another post. But one thing I have learned is that when we are tossed a curveball in life, we have to readjust our plans and just go with it in a way. Resisting it and refusing to accept it will just make us unhappy and possibly cause more pain. I could get all mad about being stuck in bed again but what good would it do? I would just be miserable. So I am going to look at the positive in this and that is I have more time for books! Also more cuddle time with my cat. lol It isn't a picnic to have to rest alot and to go through the pain so I don't need to add being mad to it too right? There are so many things I would rather be doing obviously but I am learning that sometimes there are curveballs and we have to just be flexible and try to find the positive in it. Otherwise we will just be incredibly unhappy and annoyed and frustrated. I am not perfect and I do feel annoyed about this but I will get over it. I have a really good book waiting and my time will not be totally wasted. So if you do not hear from me for a few days-I am just busy getting through what ever this is and also enjoying my good book! lol
Well I am looking at the title of this post and actually find my lame attempt of a title kind of funny! lol I want to talk about the curveballs that affect either the entire course of our life or maybe just the next few days. Curveballs that change our plans and our future. Things that happen that we are less than thrilled to see happen. I think we have all had these things happen several times in our lives and in a way it is just a part of life but it can be frustrating. I guess I am thinking about this because I have just been sent another wee little curveball that affects the next few days. Yesterday I started getting pain in my right shoulder and at first I figured it was a spasm of some kind. But it is sharp and doesn't really go away which is different from the usual spasms I get in my back. Then last night I had my leg fall asleep and it just would not wake up. At first I didn't even think there could possibly be a link between the two but there may be. Overnight my leg woke up and now I am left with quite alot of pain and now wishing I wasn't so gung ho on my leg waking up. lol But based on the stuff going on-it seems more nerve related than spasm related. I am seeing my specialist again on March 16 so that is perfect timing in some ways. So between my back and my leg I will probably be stuck in bed again a fair bit of the next few days. haha just when I was planning to try finish off my room and possibly try skating again. The timing is not great but what can I do? My room will have to wait and it will be there to finish when I can get back to it. The skating-well hopefully Bower Ponds has not thawed out before I can get another chance to try skating again. lol One great positive out of all this-I have more time to read! I love to read and currently I am reading a book that is incredibly fascinating and will have to share in another post. But one thing I have learned is that when we are tossed a curveball in life, we have to readjust our plans and just go with it in a way. Resisting it and refusing to accept it will just make us unhappy and possibly cause more pain. I could get all mad about being stuck in bed again but what good would it do? I would just be miserable. So I am going to look at the positive in this and that is I have more time for books! Also more cuddle time with my cat. lol It isn't a picnic to have to rest alot and to go through the pain so I don't need to add being mad to it too right? There are so many things I would rather be doing obviously but I am learning that sometimes there are curveballs and we have to just be flexible and try to find the positive in it. Otherwise we will just be incredibly unhappy and annoyed and frustrated. I am not perfect and I do feel annoyed about this but I will get over it. I have a really good book waiting and my time will not be totally wasted. So if you do not hear from me for a few days-I am just busy getting through what ever this is and also enjoying my good book! lol
Friday, February 26, 2010
Weather and People's moods
Hi again,
Well the weather this week has got me thinking about how much the weather affects our moods. The first half of this week we had so much fog and on Tuesday especially it was so thick that when we went for groceries, we could barely see the ditch on the side of the road. Fog is really bad for making me and most likely others feel so isolated and almost alone. I look out my window and all I see is this thick wall of white. I go outside and it can seem so eerily quiet because all I hear is the crunching of the snow under my boots as I walk. Even the birds will be silent sometimes. I know that I am not alone of course but thick fog can affect me like that. Also when you interact with people when the weather is bad, everyone seems sort of glum. Then there is the sunshine that comes and wow people just perk right up! Sunshine is so wonderful and even more so when we have had days and days of yucky weather, either snow or rain. So when the sun came out a couple of days ago I noticed that change in people's moods where everyone just seemed to get so happy-including me! Also I was able to see far into the distance again and see the neighbors and trees and so on. I used to be a cashier and it was interesting observing people's moods as the weather would make a noticable change because it seemed to affect pretty much every person. It makes me wonder why weather has such an effect on us? I really don't have the answer but I just thought I would put the question out there. Thanks again for reading!
Well the weather this week has got me thinking about how much the weather affects our moods. The first half of this week we had so much fog and on Tuesday especially it was so thick that when we went for groceries, we could barely see the ditch on the side of the road. Fog is really bad for making me and most likely others feel so isolated and almost alone. I look out my window and all I see is this thick wall of white. I go outside and it can seem so eerily quiet because all I hear is the crunching of the snow under my boots as I walk. Even the birds will be silent sometimes. I know that I am not alone of course but thick fog can affect me like that. Also when you interact with people when the weather is bad, everyone seems sort of glum. Then there is the sunshine that comes and wow people just perk right up! Sunshine is so wonderful and even more so when we have had days and days of yucky weather, either snow or rain. So when the sun came out a couple of days ago I noticed that change in people's moods where everyone just seemed to get so happy-including me! Also I was able to see far into the distance again and see the neighbors and trees and so on. I used to be a cashier and it was interesting observing people's moods as the weather would make a noticable change because it seemed to affect pretty much every person. It makes me wonder why weather has such an effect on us? I really don't have the answer but I just thought I would put the question out there. Thanks again for reading!
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Wonderful Women's Wednesday!!!
Hi again,
Well I should have commented on this yesterday but I was too busy watching our Canadian Women athletes win medals yesterday. lol WOW I am so happy for our women athletes who won medals yesterday!!! They won 4 medals yesterday!!!!! One bronze, 2 silver and one gold! They were absolutely on fire and it was so much fun watching the Olympics yesterday. It is fun watching the Olympics everyday but to see so many medals won in one day by our women athletes makes it pretty amazing! Our Women's hockey team plays tonight in the final also and they should win! But I don't want to say they will for sure because you never know what can happen right? Anyways that is going to be an amazing game-the women's hockey team never dissapoints! Also we have Joanie skating today in figure skating and she might win a medal as well and I really hope she does because she really deserves it!
Plus I should mention that I was very surprised and pleased with the men's hockey team as well. Our men's team won against Russia 7-3 which is also very amazing because in the last 50yrs our men's team has not won against Russia/Soviet once. I was so very surprised because the last game against the Americans was so bad and sloppy that it was an embarrassment and the other games they played were not much better despite them winning those games. I sort of was losing faith in our men's team but last night they did extremely well and surprised me so much! They were passing the puck very well and playing as a team and finding the net and they even had less penalties so I am impressed. As is the rest of Canada I think. I have heard so many jokes about the men's team after their recent performance that I think most Canadians were feeling basically the same as me. So let's hope our men's team keeps it up and doesn't fall asleep again and get sloppy again.
Well I should have commented on this yesterday but I was too busy watching our Canadian Women athletes win medals yesterday. lol WOW I am so happy for our women athletes who won medals yesterday!!! They won 4 medals yesterday!!!!! One bronze, 2 silver and one gold! They were absolutely on fire and it was so much fun watching the Olympics yesterday. It is fun watching the Olympics everyday but to see so many medals won in one day by our women athletes makes it pretty amazing! Our Women's hockey team plays tonight in the final also and they should win! But I don't want to say they will for sure because you never know what can happen right? Anyways that is going to be an amazing game-the women's hockey team never dissapoints! Also we have Joanie skating today in figure skating and she might win a medal as well and I really hope she does because she really deserves it!
Plus I should mention that I was very surprised and pleased with the men's hockey team as well. Our men's team won against Russia 7-3 which is also very amazing because in the last 50yrs our men's team has not won against Russia/Soviet once. I was so very surprised because the last game against the Americans was so bad and sloppy that it was an embarrassment and the other games they played were not much better despite them winning those games. I sort of was losing faith in our men's team but last night they did extremely well and surprised me so much! They were passing the puck very well and playing as a team and finding the net and they even had less penalties so I am impressed. As is the rest of Canada I think. I have heard so many jokes about the men's team after their recent performance that I think most Canadians were feeling basically the same as me. So let's hope our men's team keeps it up and doesn't fall asleep again and get sloppy again.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Birthdays
Hi again,
Well yesterday I recieved something in the mail reminding me about my upcoming birthday. It was a bday coupon for a free birthday meal at Tony Romas that I get every year. My birthday is still a month away mind you but it always comes early for some reason. Last year was the first year I felt depressed about my birthday. Apparently according to my brother in law I am suffering from a quarter life crisis. lol Jokes aside I think it is more serious than that. I am not afraid to say I am turning 27 this year and I know I am a girl and I am supposed to not want to share my age but I don't care. lol I think I am getting depressed about my birthday because of where I am in life differs from where I want to be in life. I had such big plans for my life and as of yet they have not even begun to happen. Instead I am dealing with things that were never factored into my plans -like my health. As you may or may not know, I was forced to quit working in late 2004 because I just physically and mentally could not handle it. The physical problems I was having contributed to me almost crashing emotionally because it was sort of the last straw in a series of stuff that was happening. I will not get into this but in short, I had chronic pain that just got so bad that it made it hard to work. I have had chronic pain most of my life but I could push through and force myself to keep going up until 2004. I was working full time at Save On Foods and I had also started up my own business which was part of one of my plans for my life. I was hoping to transition to cutting back on hours at the store and being able to focus more on my business but my body had other plans. I had to give up working at the store as well as my business that was doing good. I felt as if my world crashed down around me. Anyways fast forward to today and I have gone through so much and 2 back surgeries and physio and recovery and retraining my muscles to move in new ways now that I have a fused spine. I have been through so much looking back but it is not what I had planned and I still have to live at home due to being too weak in many ways to be on my own and I have very little money and I am approaching 30. I had planned to have my own business and have my own place and be helping others through volunteering and possibly mission trips. I even planned to have my own car! lol I never had plans for anything grand-just to be independant and be able to help others which I love to do. I also had hoped to have a family or at least a boyfriend by now. Isn't it funny how plans don't always work out the way we plan? I think it is safe to say that we all wish they would but I also know that sometimes we get thrown curve balls that teach us far more than we would have learned otherwise. I am not happy where I am and each birthday reminds me of it and I wonder if I had pushed myself harder if I would be in a different place than I am. I wonder if it is my fault I am not where I wanted to be-after all, doesn't everyone have stuff like this that they have to deal with? Yet other people are further ahead and I know I should not compare myself to others but it can be difficult not to. If it seems like I am contradicting myself in this post-I probably am because I am continually fighting with myself to be happy with what I have but I also feel sad about what I wish I had. I just want a life where I can be working and living on my own and that it isn't so hard to do that. If I push myself harder through the pain, will it benefit me? Or will I only get so far before I crash again from exhaustion? I am in a far better place than I was even 6months ago but I still deal with pain and being exhausted from being out and about for a couple hours. Not even enough for a part time shift and I am exhausted for 2days. It seems though that the more I push myself, the more behind I get because I get so exhausted and in so much pain that I can't continue. I know I get farther if I pace myself and yet I have a hard time with that because I think in my head that I should be doing more. I guess this doesn't seem to have so much to do with birthdays but the frustration they bring up each time they come around. One thing for sure-I will not stop pushing myself because I do not give up. That is not an option or even words in my vocabulary. Thanks for listening.
Well yesterday I recieved something in the mail reminding me about my upcoming birthday. It was a bday coupon for a free birthday meal at Tony Romas that I get every year. My birthday is still a month away mind you but it always comes early for some reason. Last year was the first year I felt depressed about my birthday. Apparently according to my brother in law I am suffering from a quarter life crisis. lol Jokes aside I think it is more serious than that. I am not afraid to say I am turning 27 this year and I know I am a girl and I am supposed to not want to share my age but I don't care. lol I think I am getting depressed about my birthday because of where I am in life differs from where I want to be in life. I had such big plans for my life and as of yet they have not even begun to happen. Instead I am dealing with things that were never factored into my plans -like my health. As you may or may not know, I was forced to quit working in late 2004 because I just physically and mentally could not handle it. The physical problems I was having contributed to me almost crashing emotionally because it was sort of the last straw in a series of stuff that was happening. I will not get into this but in short, I had chronic pain that just got so bad that it made it hard to work. I have had chronic pain most of my life but I could push through and force myself to keep going up until 2004. I was working full time at Save On Foods and I had also started up my own business which was part of one of my plans for my life. I was hoping to transition to cutting back on hours at the store and being able to focus more on my business but my body had other plans. I had to give up working at the store as well as my business that was doing good. I felt as if my world crashed down around me. Anyways fast forward to today and I have gone through so much and 2 back surgeries and physio and recovery and retraining my muscles to move in new ways now that I have a fused spine. I have been through so much looking back but it is not what I had planned and I still have to live at home due to being too weak in many ways to be on my own and I have very little money and I am approaching 30. I had planned to have my own business and have my own place and be helping others through volunteering and possibly mission trips. I even planned to have my own car! lol I never had plans for anything grand-just to be independant and be able to help others which I love to do. I also had hoped to have a family or at least a boyfriend by now. Isn't it funny how plans don't always work out the way we plan? I think it is safe to say that we all wish they would but I also know that sometimes we get thrown curve balls that teach us far more than we would have learned otherwise. I am not happy where I am and each birthday reminds me of it and I wonder if I had pushed myself harder if I would be in a different place than I am. I wonder if it is my fault I am not where I wanted to be-after all, doesn't everyone have stuff like this that they have to deal with? Yet other people are further ahead and I know I should not compare myself to others but it can be difficult not to. If it seems like I am contradicting myself in this post-I probably am because I am continually fighting with myself to be happy with what I have but I also feel sad about what I wish I had. I just want a life where I can be working and living on my own and that it isn't so hard to do that. If I push myself harder through the pain, will it benefit me? Or will I only get so far before I crash again from exhaustion? I am in a far better place than I was even 6months ago but I still deal with pain and being exhausted from being out and about for a couple hours. Not even enough for a part time shift and I am exhausted for 2days. It seems though that the more I push myself, the more behind I get because I get so exhausted and in so much pain that I can't continue. I know I get farther if I pace myself and yet I have a hard time with that because I think in my head that I should be doing more. I guess this doesn't seem to have so much to do with birthdays but the frustration they bring up each time they come around. One thing for sure-I will not stop pushing myself because I do not give up. That is not an option or even words in my vocabulary. Thanks for listening.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
YAY for COUPONS and SALES!!!
Hi again,
I love coupons so much! It is so much fun when you are able to combine a sale with a coupon and get something free. Today I got 3 packages of Egg Creations Eggs for free and 1 package for .25! These normally cost close to 3.00 I think. They are not cheap and normally I can't afford them so I am eating fancy eggs for a bit!! YAY! I also found SideKicks on clearance for .59 and used a .25 coupon on them to get three for 1.00!! Usually the sale price for Sidekicks is 1.00 so this was so exciting! Plus my mom and I saw two carts where people didn't take out the Loonies so we got two loonies also! YAY! Who doesn't love free money? lol Plus I went to Shoppers Drug Mart and got LIfe Brand Lactaids for 9.99 each and would normally cost about 17.99 so I saved almost half! On Sunday my parents went to Safeway and got 2 packages of Hot Dog buns for .50 each (retail 3.00 normally) and 2 packages mini cupcakes for .50 (retail about 3.00?) and Strudals for .50 (easily normaly 3.00) and Pizza shells for .50 (retail-who knows?) We have been eating very well lately! This is how we afford to eat! lol I don't think we ever pay full price-I don't think we could afford to. So just the Safeway trip on Sunday my parents saved 15-20.00! Last week I went to Safeway and spent 13.00 and it would have cost 39.00! But personally who ever pays full price at Safeway is odd because Safeway's prices are inflated. Sorry lately we have been doing good on groceries which is good because money is tight. I like to share when we have found great deals because it is so exciting!
I love coupons so much! It is so much fun when you are able to combine a sale with a coupon and get something free. Today I got 3 packages of Egg Creations Eggs for free and 1 package for .25! These normally cost close to 3.00 I think. They are not cheap and normally I can't afford them so I am eating fancy eggs for a bit!! YAY! I also found SideKicks on clearance for .59 and used a .25 coupon on them to get three for 1.00!! Usually the sale price for Sidekicks is 1.00 so this was so exciting! Plus my mom and I saw two carts where people didn't take out the Loonies so we got two loonies also! YAY! Who doesn't love free money? lol Plus I went to Shoppers Drug Mart and got LIfe Brand Lactaids for 9.99 each and would normally cost about 17.99 so I saved almost half! On Sunday my parents went to Safeway and got 2 packages of Hot Dog buns for .50 each (retail 3.00 normally) and 2 packages mini cupcakes for .50 (retail about 3.00?) and Strudals for .50 (easily normaly 3.00) and Pizza shells for .50 (retail-who knows?) We have been eating very well lately! This is how we afford to eat! lol I don't think we ever pay full price-I don't think we could afford to. So just the Safeway trip on Sunday my parents saved 15-20.00! Last week I went to Safeway and spent 13.00 and it would have cost 39.00! But personally who ever pays full price at Safeway is odd because Safeway's prices are inflated. Sorry lately we have been doing good on groceries which is good because money is tight. I like to share when we have found great deals because it is so exciting!
Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir win Gold in Ice Dance!!!
Hi again,
I know I have not been blogging about the other Canadian athletes that have won medals though I have meant to. I NEED to blog about Tessa and Scott though because this is so amazing that Canada won the first gold in Ice Dance ever! Russia has held the Gold in Ice Dance since 1960! The United States has not even won Gold in Ice Dance so this is AMAZING! Plus Tessa and Scott could not have been more deserving! They were so in sync and almost floating on the ice and the lifts and turns were so beautiful and magical and I was just getting goosebumps!!!! Plus the difficulty level in the lifts and turns and jumps was higher I think than others skating. I was almost in tears because it was so beautiful! I just am so proud of Tessa and Scott and ALL of our athletes whether they have won a medal or not. Congrats to Tessa and Scott and I hope they know how loved they are!
I know I have not been blogging about the other Canadian athletes that have won medals though I have meant to. I NEED to blog about Tessa and Scott though because this is so amazing that Canada won the first gold in Ice Dance ever! Russia has held the Gold in Ice Dance since 1960! The United States has not even won Gold in Ice Dance so this is AMAZING! Plus Tessa and Scott could not have been more deserving! They were so in sync and almost floating on the ice and the lifts and turns were so beautiful and magical and I was just getting goosebumps!!!! Plus the difficulty level in the lifts and turns and jumps was higher I think than others skating. I was almost in tears because it was so beautiful! I just am so proud of Tessa and Scott and ALL of our athletes whether they have won a medal or not. Congrats to Tessa and Scott and I hope they know how loved they are!
Saturday, February 20, 2010
It's been awhile!
Hi again,
I apologize for not writing for so long but lately I have been sort of immersed in everything Olympics. I love the Olympics and it is so fun to watch. I marvel at the abilities of the athletes who make these sports look so easy. Sometimes I wish I could do what they do and I wonder if that is normal? But I have my own talents and abilities that I must not forget about and continue to enjoy watching and marveling at what these athletes can do!
I wanted to also touch on what has happened since posting the post about my past if you don't mind. It is interesting because up till now I have had this secret that when I meet new people, I feel that if they ever found out then the friendship would be over. I feel as though they would not like the real me and they can't find out. I have to say this is quite a weight to carry around. I decided to post this about my past so that I am open about it and that it can't continue to have a hold on me. Talking about this openly on here has really actually helped in the sense that I am saying this is me and it is not a secret I am willing to carry around any longer. I am not saying that when I meet new people I will tell them this and be all open about everything but that it isn't something I will hide with worry that I will not be accepted. I feel as though I can walk a little taller now and I can be me without feeling I am worth less than other people. This may seem small to others but to me it is huge. I am hoping this is it and what happened to me as a child no longer has any hold over me what so ever. I feel as though I have shed the last of the weight from it that was weighing me down and I am free of it. This does not mean I won't have a problem with this when it happens to others and that I won't relate to others who have dealt with this but now it is something I can hopefully look at more objectively as a past experience that is no longer affecting me. Thanks again for reading my blog!
I apologize for not writing for so long but lately I have been sort of immersed in everything Olympics. I love the Olympics and it is so fun to watch. I marvel at the abilities of the athletes who make these sports look so easy. Sometimes I wish I could do what they do and I wonder if that is normal? But I have my own talents and abilities that I must not forget about and continue to enjoy watching and marveling at what these athletes can do!
I wanted to also touch on what has happened since posting the post about my past if you don't mind. It is interesting because up till now I have had this secret that when I meet new people, I feel that if they ever found out then the friendship would be over. I feel as though they would not like the real me and they can't find out. I have to say this is quite a weight to carry around. I decided to post this about my past so that I am open about it and that it can't continue to have a hold on me. Talking about this openly on here has really actually helped in the sense that I am saying this is me and it is not a secret I am willing to carry around any longer. I am not saying that when I meet new people I will tell them this and be all open about everything but that it isn't something I will hide with worry that I will not be accepted. I feel as though I can walk a little taller now and I can be me without feeling I am worth less than other people. This may seem small to others but to me it is huge. I am hoping this is it and what happened to me as a child no longer has any hold over me what so ever. I feel as though I have shed the last of the weight from it that was weighing me down and I am free of it. This does not mean I won't have a problem with this when it happens to others and that I won't relate to others who have dealt with this but now it is something I can hopefully look at more objectively as a past experience that is no longer affecting me. Thanks again for reading my blog!
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